Four winds of change

Hi everyone, I tried out Nisaba’s four winds of change spread (http://www.tarotforum.net/showthread.php?t=154709) and wouldn’t mind a hand! Cheers ☺

The situation – contemplating cutting the final ties with a friend very, very soon. (…we dated last year and I fell in love with him). We live in different cities now and agreed to be friends. I’m thinking of ending everything altogether and never speaking to him again because that might be easier on my heart.

Signifier for the situation:

I chose the four of cups. I feel like I’m the person looking at the cups in front, feeling sad when there are good things on offer behind. I’m currently in a great spot in my life but still prone to extreme sadness over this person. Last night I had a lot of people asking me how it’s possible I don’t have a boyfriend…so maybe there’s a cup being offered to me, maybe there is somebody interested, but I can’t see it because I’m concentrating on being dissatisfied with what I have and don’t have now.

Card 2: what motivates me to make change.

10 of swords – I feel like the relationship is dead. It’s time to move on. We’ve reached the finished line and there’s nowhere else to go. It also signifies the fact that this hasn’t been an easy ending. It’s been painful.

Card 3: what is keeping you from making change.

High Priestess – no idea. Does this mean I’m overthinking things? Perhaps there’s other information to come to light that I’m waiting for?

Card 4: thought-patterns that will serve you in making change.

Page of wands – I’m not very good with pages. I’ve read that the meaning can relate to new learning and discoveries, which pretty much describes my current life. Is it telling me to embrace changes in my relationships in the same way I’ve embraced other new things that have happened in my life this year?

Card 5: thought-patterns that prevent you from making change.

Queen of Wands - I understand this one because for me it represents a real person. Don’t want to say too much but I understand it as me dwelling on the past and not moving forward.

Card 6: behaviours you need to adopt to make change.

9 of Wands - this might mean being a little bit more defensive? Or a suggestion to wait a bit longer to assess my options? Or maybe it serves as a reminder that this will soon pass – with this situation, I’m almost at the end. A reminder to myself to ‘hang in there’ so to speak?

Card 7: behaviours you need to prevent to make change.

Death – I don’t understand. I thought this would be a card for the previous question. Could this possibly mean that it won’t be a good idea to sever the friendship? To me, this card is saying ‘don’t kill the friendship’ but I feel like I should. I don’t know what else to do!

edit: I used RWS

I just saw this spread and your reading with it Do you mind telling me if you used the RW for it ? I would like to look at the images before pitching in...

I do believe that Card 1 and Card 2 are quite appropriate, but I do think that the High Priestess is there to show you, that you have only been listening to your heart and not everywhere else- logic, your mind, the pain you feel, people around you, etc.

With Card 4 and 5, the Queen of Wands shows that you don’t control the reins on your emotional energy and let it run high and control you (like the High Priestess is hinting). You have to shut off that high-energy for a while and return to the Page, humble beginning once again with no romantic interest and letting it develop from something small, gradually.

Card 6 is telling you to not fear letting go of that high emotional energy. You fear you will be vulnerable to new people and situations once you finally let this friend go- but the thing is that will bring you new opportunities too.

Card 7- You need to let this friendship/romance go. Really. Also, it means to stop viewing this ‘letting go’ so negatively and fearing it, etc. Let it just happen, and find positivity from it as soon as you can before it drains you of good, stable energy for starting anew.

Card 2: what motivates me to make change.

10 of swords – Painful ? Yes. But the fact that there is no blood coming from this man shows that it is not "alive" any more and that wounds have begun to heal. To me, this card is an echo to the significator. Check the swords: they are ALL the same. It feels as if things haven't changed or gone anywhere and possibly not much else to be shared, said or lived together. A horrible sense of rut and not seeing the point in continuing on this path.

Card 3: what is keeping you from making change.

High Priestess – fear. The HP, although very wise and composed is very protected within her two pillars. And once you get off that chair and leave that, you will feel exposed. Maybe your heart wants freedom but is not quite sure it can handle it...

Card 4: thought-patterns that will serve you in making change.

Page of wands – Are you young ? Physically or in your mind ? The Page suggests that you can, if willing be quite positive and dynamic dealing with projects and planning new ways of doing things. I imagine that is something vivid in your studies and/or your work. Thing is, starting something new on the emotional side is very different... And for THAT, you usually like to take more time, plan better and not rush.

Card 5: thought-patterns that prevent you from making change.

Queen of Wands - You HATE being the source of pain . You HATE making others suffer because of something you did, said or even the way you act. Be a bit more selfish this time.

Card 6: behaviours you need to adopt to make change.

9 of Wands - Questioning yourself if hanging in there is worth the trouble and pain. This guy was probably hurt by a wand but uses it to protect himself. He didn't mind doing that because in the long run, these wands kept him "safe" (act as a barrier). However, now, he is pondering the use of all that fight, especially because that barrier has kept him isolated from others which is starting to be painful as well.

Card 7: behaviours you need to prevent to make change.

Death – Don't see things in the light of tragedy or final end. Death, in short. It is the death OF A PHASE. Like a pregnant woman who gives birth, she may "miss" carrying the baby in her womb but does not see the delivery as death. It was a necessary stage that made way for another.

Just my 2 cents.