And I wish I knew the answer
I think Astrological influences are often a lot more subtle and background than we expect. Another of the 'sins' of the psychological astrologers (and indeed newspaper columns) is to lead people into believing that planets come up and hit you on the head (so to speak).
Now this does indeed happen but thankfully not every day or even every week or month. The lunar cycle has an influence but it is very much at the subtle end for most people (though some, such as my wife, react strongly to New Moons or Full Moons).
Even worse, there are a number of possible lunar cycles - as we've seen above. One of them is likely to work for you - but the same one doesn't work for everyone. So there's an investment of effort to find which cycle people operate on.
A good coverage of both the lunar cycle and eclipses is in Bernadette Brady's 'Predictive Astrology, The Eagle and the Lark' and I tend to work from her, when I look at these areas. There's another fairly good book on retunrs by Janey Stubbs and Babs Kirkby - 'Interpreting Solar and Lunar Returns', which also takes a quick look at Mercury and Venus returns as well.
Returning to Eclipses, the traditional approach is to treat these as operating at the mundane level - societies, nations, states, tribes, rather than at the individual level. So whilst we are all affected to a greater or lesser degree, as members of society, we should not expect to have an upfront personal experience - unless the eclipse makes an important aspect to the natal chart. Again some people will be more sensitive than others - or at least more aware of an effect. Brady gives a very good outline of the Saros Cycles and approaches to eclipses.
I take a strong view (highly traditional) that Astrology is not deterministic but gives us additional information which can inform our choices. The problems come when we tend to believe that there are forces out there which control us and which we cannot influence. In part the attitude to outer planet transits, which the psychologists adopt tend to foster the latter view, despite their avowed belief that the aim is to get people to take responsibility for their lives.
I not only understand but agree strongly with ncefafn that it is often better to let life surprise us than to search for 'determining factors'. I very rarely look at my own outer transits (or indeed any transits) except in retrospect. I prefer in the main to let life take its course. It may also be that it's difficult to interpret for yourself. That being said a solar return which can indicate the flavour of the year is quite useful because the interpretation is 'light'. I do however use horary techniques to help me examine issues that are current - such as the pet cat that goes missing and whether he will come back.
