10 of Wands as feelings

Asking about someone's feelings for me, I droped 10 of Wands.

RWS Deck.

I guess he is full of passion for me. But it means a lot of extra work and he is superficial and "weak" when the question is emotions management.

It's a gay love and he is very inside of the closet yet (I have no patience with beginners). I'm open and very proud of myself.

Is very heavy for him. (It's Ridiculous! I can't understand weakness.)

Some extra insight?!

His feelings for you are a burden that he bears. If he's not out of the closet yet, that could explain why his feelings are reflected as 10W. I don't know of anyone who came out of the womb out of the closet, so it's a process that almost every gay person I know has had to go through. I wouldn't call that weakness though.

Rodney

I agree with Rodney that his feelings are a burden and maybe he wishes he didn't have them. His feelings are making his life difficult and complicated. Could also be that he feels you are putting enormous pressure on him. 10 of wands says to me the situation is an uphill battle from his perspective.

I wouldn't equate the 10 of wands with being full of passion necessarily.

I don't see weakness in the 10 of wands... This is someone who carries on despite the difficulty and burdens he feels, rather than running away.

Afraid to share his burden

crystalrose said:

I don't see weakness in the 10 of wands... This is someone who carries on despite the difficulty and burdens he feels, rather than running away.

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Exactly! The 10/Wands is someone who is overly responsible. Who doesnt' run away from burdens, but lifts them up and adds them to the already too heavy pile he's carrying. I think he sees you so full of energy and passion--and feels that he himself doesn't have any left to be, like you, so wholly invested, so "out of the closet." But I think your impatience with him is unkind and ill-considered.

What does he feel for you?: He feels that he hasn't any energy/passion to spare for you--he has so many others demanding his energy/passion and he still feels obligated to give them that energy, whether or not they deserve it. But he also feels obligated to find some for you. It's going to add to his burden, but he knows you're right, and he's trying to scrape together some for you as well.

I think you owe this person an apology for believing him weak. Truth is, his only weakness is that he really should ask for help. He's carrying everything on his own, and by himself. He needs someone to say, "You don't have to do this alone. You can be given help, and strength and energy to make this easier. Be willing to share your burden."

Bright insights.

To me to be open for love is basic in a person's life. Everyone should fight for love - what realy matter to feel before death. My life putted some obstacles and I fought against then. To me don't fight is weakness (to lose too).

He is a grown up men. Independent one. He can do it. (or should to)

The Feeling of shame for himself are sickness.

He is selfish and self hatred.

I will never apology my proud of myself 'cause he don't.

Thank you all!!!

(I'm the King of Wands )

Adding shame to his burden of shame?

dailytarot said:

He is a growned up men.

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I've known many grown-ups kept and trapped by those they love in childhood, and many children who have been forced into adulthood. Age is not how you should judge anyone's ability to "do it." Sir Ian McKellen, a proud gay man, waited till he was nearly fifty years old before coming out publicly and becoming a gay activist. Should that count against him? Because he waited till he was that old?

I'm not saying you be with this person or hide yourself. But a good tarot reader tries to be understanding and forgiving of human foibles, mishaps, mistakes and difficulties and, yes, even fears, hypocrisies and weaknesses. You won't get this man past his shame by adding to it.

And perhaps that's what the 10/Wands is saying? That you're adding to his shame with more shame, rather than helping him to free himself of it?

For me personally, I still struggle with 10 of Wands as feelings. My ex fiancé broke up with me right before summer - and right before the wedding! I asked the cards at different times what his feelings for me were. Somehow, 10 of Wands always came up. I thought it meant regret in a way, or taking full responsibility for the break up. After all, he was the one initiating it without a clear reason (he was likely a commitment phobe). As it turned out later, it was him seeing me as a burden in his life. He didn't want a committed relationship; he didn't want to own a house with me; he didn't want to share household chores; he didn't want another person in his private space 24/7; he didn't want to "sacrifice" some of his freetime outside of work with another person...

Given my experience with this card, I wouldn't feel too confident about this other person's feelings. In my experience, that means that this person sees you as a burden. You can turn that into something positive, as in he doesn't know how to approach you and make his feelings clear, or it can turn into a negative burden as described above.

Thirteen said:

And perhaps that's what the 10/Wands is saying? That you're adding to his shame with more shame, rather than helping him to free himself of it?

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This is the crux of it. In my readings, 10 of wands has come to up show a person who has a difficult life, and then something or someone comes along and adds to the crosses that person already has to bear. The person usually feels like they have no other option but to grin and bear it, so they keep going despite the load... all alone, with no end in sight. It's HARD and lonely.

To be frank, if him being in the closet is a huge dealbreaker for you & you're not willing to be supportive or accepting about it, you may be better off finding another partner. That way you're not inflicting more pain onto a person who is already suffering.

I'm a kind of hash men with a lot of dates. I'm poligamic. I am full of love, lucky.

I understand what is be in a closet. All the pain and presure... more then you all. Everyone find a way to fight. I wish the best.

I usually cut the bad peoples off my circles and rotine.

All my ex (most of) are not in my life anymore at all (ex and some dates too). I cannot be a presure or make any tension. I'm out. He is off.

So how feelings are like burdens? I'm not there.