Ethics of Reading Another's Situation

prudence said:

If this were my own belief, I would hold the same opinion about reading for others without their permission that you do. I would feel quite strongly about it.

But, this is not how I see it at all. I do not believe it is a violation of anyone's soul/energy. I respect your belief in this notion though and that you are able to share your feelings about it with us, without telling any of us on the other side of the debate that we are wrong.

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Thank you, prudence. I started this thread to see what other people's opinions were, since I think it's an interesting topic. I also enjoy challenging people's opinions, but I am happy that none take offense to this.

Goddessofthehunter said:

Why not? If the cards choose to give possible insight to people then I feel it's there for us to utitilze. We all know that sometimes the cards do not give us info on someone or something, THAT'S when I feel it's a clue that it's not meant for us to know or "none of our business" as some would say. I think being able to get insight on people is a special gift that the tarot gives us or it wouldn't be possible and that's what's so alluring to me at times. I do believe it's our responsibility to not take advantage of this information though.

Just my two pennies.

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Magicus Textor said:

Just a few things to think about. It is fine if you agree or not, but just want to share some thoughts:

When ready insight is so available to us, can it not be tempting to use it in ways that are not proper to us?

Just because it is there, does not mean that it is right for us to use it. There are countless stories of people who have come into great supernatural power or ability in one way or another— perhaps naturally, perhaps taught by a yogi or master, etc— who misuse it for things they should not be using it for, and thus it is taken away from them.

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To both these - one from each side of the fence - if we find the diary of someone - someone we KNOW is in trouble - is it "in the greater good" to read it ? I'm with Magicus Textor - I think just because we CAN does not mean we should.

But I too am delighted with the polite and restrained nature of the posts sharing various views in this thread. WE disagree and still do not insult one another's ethics. I love that

gregory said:

To both these - one from each side of the fence - if we find the diary of someone - someone we KNOW is in trouble - is it "in the greater good" to read it ? I'm with Magicus Textor - I think just because we CAN does not mean we should.

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If my tarot reading ability gave me the exact same information, details, and vivid descriptions as someone's personal diary, then I would not do readings such as described in this thread. It would be a no brainer. But yeah, I have not achieved that kind of reading ability in all of the years that I have been reading.

I do not read other people's diaries, and I have a feeling most of the others in this thread who, like me, will read about people without asking permission, are not the type of people who go snooping into other people's diaries. I suppose we could even compare this type of reading to inspecting other people's worn underpants without their permission. It's certainly a despicable thing to do, and anyone who would do such a thing would be asked why it's their business to look into it at all. And talk about an invasion of privacy! Buuut, again, my tarot reading skills are not going to bring me the type of deep down personal information, smells and colors that inspecting someone else's dirty underpants would. So the comparison would not be congruent, though just the act of comparing my reading practices to snooping in someone's dirty underpants without their permission would be a bit of an underhanded jab at me and my reading practices. And for that effort, I would have to say "touche".

gregory said:

To both these - one from each side of the fence - if we find the diary of someone - someone we KNOW is in trouble - is it "in the greater good" to read it ? I'm with Magicus Textor - I think just because we CAN does not mean we should.

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Dependson the situation, and how they are in trouble. I cannot currently think of a situation where I would do it.

Do I do readings about others without permission. Yes and no. It all rather depends on the circumstance and intent. I wouldn't, for example, do a reading on someone for morbid curiosity's sake. I might if I felt they needed some help, but the reading might be more along the lines of "how can I help" rather than "ooooh! what's going on in their life?" I guess I kind of see it as the difference between talking with a friend when you see them in the grocery store & asking how things are going and asking prying questions to try to help, as opposed to sneaking around peeking through their windows at night.

An exception to this is political figures. As far as I'm concerned, if they are trying to get me to vote them into a public office where they will have a say in the laws that govern us all, they are fair game. I have done and will continue to do Tarot readings about people running for political office.

I generally abide by these "rules" (which are not hard and fast) which I have set for myself when I do readings for other people. It really comes down to intent. If someone comes to me for a reading on "what is my ex doing and who is he/she seeing", I'll probably try to steer them into more of a direction of their own needs and desires in relation to this past relationship. If I felt too uncomfortable with what they were asking, I might refuse the reading all together. There is a point, in my opinion, where we can cross a line and invade a person's privacy. I guess, to an extent I kind of go along with most laws regarding recording conversations ... most states won't allow a conversation to be recorded without the consent of at least one of the parties involved. A person who comes to me for a reading on their relationship, I'll do that, because it is about both them and their significant other. If a person wants me to, essentially, aid in stalking someone ... not so much.

These are my own personal set of "rules" (which are not set in stone). I've built on them over a long time. And, as with most things in life, are subject to change.

prudence said:

If my tarot reading ability gave me the exact same information, details, and vivid descriptions as someone's personal diary, then I would not do readings such as described in this thread. It would be a no brainer. But yeah, I have not achieved that kind of reading ability in all of the years that I have been reading.

I do not read other people's diaries, and I have a feeling most of the others in this thread who, like me, will read about people without asking permission, are not the type of people who go snooping into other people's diaries. I suppose we could even compare this type of reading to inspecting other people's worn underpants without their permission. It's certainly a despicable thing to do, and anyone who would do such a thing would be asked why it's their business to look into it at all. And talk about an invasion of privacy! Buuut, again, my tarot reading skills are not going to bring me the type of deep down personal information, smells and colors that inspecting someone else's dirty underpants would. So the comparison would not be congruent, though just the act of comparing my reading practices to snooping in someone's dirty underpants without their permission would be a bit of an underhanded jab at me and my reading practices. And for that effort, I would have to say "touche".

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To me, a lesser "sin" is not a negation of "sin". I use the word for illustrative purposes only.

Example: you steal money from work, vs. you steal a few small supplies from work.

Which is more "wrong"? Well, both. The act is the same, but just to a different degree. However, we as a society tend to justify the smaller degree— “they won't miss it, anyway,” or “They'll never know.”

Understand, I am not comparing reading without permission to theft. I'm simply saying that if delving into someone's private life is wrong when done to a large degree, it is wrong to a small degree, too. There's no difference. What you have to decide is whether such is wrong in the first place.

But I'm not even sure if there is a difference. I see examples all the time in the "your readings" forum where the conclusion is that someone is cheating on someone else. That certainly seems to be diary material, and something that a person may not be willing to reveal.

My rule is, if someone wouldn't tell me if I asked, then I have no right to divine it.

Very interesting discussion. For me currently only of theoretical concern as I don't have the time or interest to delve into readings about people that don't impact me and I don't have the skills yet to get any concrete info through Tarot if I tried.

Magicus Textor said:

When I was attuned to Reiki, my Reiki teacher told me never to do healing without permission. Healing seems to be something that is always for the highest good, but people have a right over themselves, their soul, their life, and their own karma. If they do not desire healing, then I must allow them to work through the lessons on their own, and respect that. I can love them with unconditional Love, as should be done always, but that is all that I can do. This is what I teach to my students as well.

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I was told the same by my Reiki teacher and I also was told never to use Magick for another without permission. And I always struggled with this. If I saw someone trying to commit suizide, should I let him/her die so as not to interfer with their will? If I'm allowed to interfer in such a situation with mundane methods (which I think I am obligated to try), why should I not be allowed to use Reiki, Magick or Tarot? After all, they are just different tools.
(I was also told that Reiki can only be used for the highest good and if healing isn't the highest good it wouldn't do anything, so we have a contradiction right there, but this is for another discussion.)

Magicus Textor said:

I think the lesson is the same in reading someone, but even more important. I see reading someone without permission as a violation of their soul/energy. They have the right to release what they wish to release to whom they wish to release it.

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The way I see it, if I'm able to read on an issue, the people involved have released a certain energy into the "public sphere". Otherwise, I simply wouldn't get any useful answer from the cards.

Magicus Textor said:

I say a prayer before every reading that I do. I say, may the wisdom of the Universe be unlocked to me, but should it not be for the highest good of all involved, then may I be misled, that no violation may occur.

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Now that is a wonderful practice.

Bright Blessings,
MountainGirl

this is another interesting thread and I too enjoy hearing everyone's (differing) opinions as it helps me to examine my own thoughts and actions on the matter in question.

Magicus Textor said:

Is it ethical to read about another person's situation that has not asked you to read about it, and/or does not know that you are doing so?

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I have to go back to the original question, which I have seen many times in this forum over the years. The thing that always sticks out for me though is not the issue of ethics because I am confident in myself that I am an ethical person, but the issue of reading about someone without their permission...no matter how you cut it (in my view) this is exactly what tarot is! a tool to peer into a situation from differing perspectives/directions and hopefully gleen a better understanding of it and the people involved.

Even when I read for myself I am still reading about other people (gasp, without their permission/knowledge) because their lives are connected to my life and what they do or don't do, think or don't think, can affect me (whatever issue I am reading about for myself). When we read at the request of others, we are still reading about people and situations affecting them that have not given their "permission" to be read about. So, my point being, it is not so cut and dried an issue. And if I felt it was "unethical" to catch a glimpse into someone else's inner life (as though I was driving past their home and their windows were open and I could see in), then I really should not be picking up the tarot cards at all because it will happen (if I have my eyes/heart open), that is the nature of the cards themselves.

I agree with those that have said "it depends" because I don't make it a practice to peer at the dirty laundry of others just for kicks and giggles, but if I wish to know if I can help someone or I wish to know what's going on with someone or a group then I will read about that situation and obviously I'm not going to call them up and say hey, I think you need a tarot reading because I want to have a better insight into what's happening with you!

Personally, I think the "ethical" part comes into play with how we utilize whatever information we gain (whether this is a reading done with or without 'permission')...

when I read for someone by request I try to present my take on the cards as gently and as straight forward as possible, and with the understanding that nothing is "set in stone" and that the reading is only as good as my personal intuition and understanding of the cards. which is to say, I could very well have it all wrong. even then, I have a few times in life had people just become completely irate with me and argue every point I tried to show them in the cards. so be it, I did my best and I was ethical.

when I read for someone as a part of my own understanding of the world and the people around me, whatever I "see" in the cards never leaves that reading other than to possibly help me interact better with the person or event in question. In other words, if I were to read in this manner and I thought I saw in the cards the divorce of another person I would not be pounding on that person's door saying 'OMG, you're going to get divorced!!!'. First of all, that would be stupid IMNSHO, but it would also be unethical because I don't know that for a fact and all I would be doing at that point is fearmongering and perhaps creating a self-fulfilling prophecy by putting doubt into that person. It also doesn't mean it's not going to happen, but unless this person asked (beforehand) specifically to know what the cards had to say, then it's not my place to try to force that information on them.

I hope my 2 cents has made some sense

Magicus Textor said:

I see what you are getting at here. However, if I ask you for your SSN, will ou give it? It is something you have not created and do not own.

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Well I don't see a social security number as any type of energy that directly or indirectly impacts others and what is the use of that information, unless its to locate someone or some assets that the other person feels has an impact on them in some way. Here I think you are mixing apples and oranges in that, you are taking something spiritual in nature, and comparing it to something physical or something that represents things that are manifested and used for a specific purpose. Feelings and thought on the other hand in my belief or the beginning of creation and as such they emit and energy that impacts things that will be manifest in the future. If we take this stance, we should not delve into the future or the past or anything such as that. Intention is a powerful thing in my thinking and to understand ones intentions or someone else's intentions on any level, is a gift, it helps us to align ourselves with our purpose in life. Reading on the past also helps us discern the intentions and how those intentions in the past have brought us to the present.

Yes, we are all one, but we are all on our own path as well, and are responsible for only ourselves.

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To me part of being responsible for myself is knowing and understanding the intentions of others towards me or towards things that impact me.

When I was attuned to Reiki, my Reiki teacher told me never to do healing without permission. Healing seems to be something that is always for the highest good, but people have a right over themselves, their soul, their life, and their own karma. If they do not desire healing, then I must allow them to work through the lessons on their own, and respect that. I can love them with unconditional Love, as should be done always, but that is all that I can do. This is what I teach to my students as well.

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This is a very good example, because you are giving something or sending some energy for a specific purpose to another soul, and doing so in a responsible manner. However reading that person energy as it relates to you, or situation that impact you should not impact that individual, as you sending them any energy to help them along their path. In reading you are simply discerning the energy surrounding a situation. And if its not out there and has no impact on the person asking the cards will reflect that. I have had readings where the answer was basically "sweep around your own front door..." meaning that the focus should be on myself instead of the other person. I believe the Universe is intelligent like that, and gives you what you need to know or be aware of in order to thrive and grow. I believe that the Universe supports us as individuals - even through the cards. Nothing will be revealed that is not in our best interest to know. I always feel funny when we as humans take the stance that our knowledge and ethics are greater than the Universe itself. Especially when dealing with energy work and in this realm. We are the students here.

I think thelesson is the same in reading someone, but even more important. I see reading someone without permission as a violation of their soul/energy. They have the right to release what they wish to release to whom they wish to release it.

I say a prayer before every reading that I do. I say, may the wisdom of the Universe be unlocked to me, but should it not be for the highest good of all involved, then may I be misled, that no violation may occur.

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If that energy has not been released - or I should say that once that energy is released, and it is released as we intermingle, and entwine with one another, then it becomes open to view its impact on all situations and people involved.

Magicus Textor said:

Understand, I am not comparing reading without permission to theft. I'm simply saying that if delving into someone's private life is wrong when done to a large degree, it is wrong to a small degree, too. There's no difference. What you have to decide is whether such is wrong in the first place.

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But there are many things that are, strictly speaking, wrong, but we do them anyway. Lying for example, isn't a nice thing to do, but there is no one who is completely honest all the time. It is sometimes ever preferable to lie than to tell the truth, because etiquette demands it. For example, taking a sick day from when you're not sick but just too lazy, or telling someone you like their new dress even though you don't really but it makes them happy so you lie. Everything is a question of degrees and shades. Is murder the same as swatting a mosquito? From the point of view of the mosquito is probably is, but few people if any don't commit that type of murder ever. Even theft, for example, taking a pen from work is by the strictest definitions theft, but I'm sure no one would equate that with robbing an old lady at gunpoint.

I agree with prudence that if Tarot ever gave me the kind of information that reading someone's diary would, I would feel it is wrong, but it doesn't. On the contrary, if I give someone a reading, I feel it is important not to judge and to see shades of gray rather than black and white, since apart from having good ethics the other perhaps most important aspect of a reader is empathy. Not necessarily sympathy, mind you, but knowing when to put yourself in their shoes beyond my own standards of right and wrong.