The Tower as why I like him??

spookyboo22

Hi
This guy has just dropped me home again tonight.
We have a big chemistry and we've known each other for about twenty years.
We've been out a couple of times but we always end up falling out but I feel such an attraction to him and that never changes. I'm sure he feels the same but we just can't be honest with other and I don't know why.
I asked the tarot... Why do I like this guy continuously despite everything ?and I pulled The Tower
I see the lightening flash and think electricity, real chemistry even though he drives me crazy.
I pulled a clarifier and got the two of swords.
I can never make my mind up.
Anyone got any other thoughts please? x

violetdaisy

It could also be that you don't really see that he's not good for you. (Not good as in there's nothing to build on that's stable) The tower is a pretty grand structure and promises safety but in this instance it would be better to be a fish in the wide open sea. He's a poor facsimile of what you're looking for but you think you know what you're getting into and are willing to ride the storm...for a while.

witchofglass

violetdaisy said:
It could also be that you don't really see that he's not good for you. (Not good as in there's nothing to build on that's stable) The tower is a pretty grand structure and promises safety but in this instance it would be better to be a fish in the wide open sea. He's a poor facsimile of what you're looking for but you think you know what you're getting into and are willing to ride the storm...for a while.

I definitely, majorly agree with the "nothing stable" aspect of this post. 2swords is a balancing act - the two together to me say that this is a relationship where you would have to be extremely careful to keep up that balancing act, or the whole shebang will come tumbling down on your head.

I can see why you'd feel drawn to the lightning on the Tower, but that the catalyst of destruction itself (on most versions of the card, anyway). What you perceive as chemistry and being attracted is what keeps you coming back, but that's also what's causing the disaster. To build off violetdaisy again - you think acting on that attraction is a good idea, but it's not. Better to wait out the storm and look elsewhere, because continuing to chase this guy is just going to come down around your ears again and again.

Thirteen

Seems pretty obvious to me. He shakes up your world, turns it up side down. And you like the battle of words you have with him. It pumps the adrenaline, makes you feel alive and awake and alert and smart and sharp (like swords).

The Hebrew word for the Tower is "mouth" and it's related, essentially, to a "shout." It says, "that's not true!" and brings down the false tower. Meanwhile, your clarifier says that you like verbal battles (when you lay down a clarifier, you say to the deck "sorry, I don't understand. Can you say that again?" so the 2/Swords is the *same message* as the tower, just said differently). Yes, 2/Swords indicates compromise and a pause in the fighting, but that means that prior to that, there was fighting. And Swords, being intellectual and verbal, indicate a war of words and wits.

So, I'd say you like him because he engages your mind like no one else does. He erects false structures, and you like bringing them down. He brings out his sword, and you bring out yours. It gives you both a charge.

Grizabella

Speaking of adrenaline-----I was just thinking that maybe you're addicted to adrenaline. Don't laugh. People really do get addicted to it and when a woman doesn't have it, she feels like nothing exciting is happening----"ho hum"----and then then she instigates something that will give her that adrenaline boost again. It's a common problem for abused women. (Not that I'm saying you are.) Women who are used to abuse think they're dating somebody really boring when a guy is genuinely nice, genuinely interested in them, and genuinely capable of a good kind of love that can be grown into instead of fallen into.

I also blame romance novels and movies for part of it. In a romance novel, there's a certain progression---girl meets boy, girl can't stand boy, and from then on it's nothing but come together, fight again, come together, fight again until finally at the end it's happily ever after and he's her soulmate. That's not what really happens in real life though in healthy relationships.

So maybe you've somehow entered into a similar relationship with this guy. It's possible. On the other hand, maybe it's just a bumpy start to romance. You've known him a long time so there's enough familiarity between you two that allows you to disagree with him outright whereas if he were someone you didn't know so well, you might overlook differences and just keep quiet.

At any rate, I wish you lots of luck with this. Keep us posted. I love updates. It helps us all learn from each other.

spookyboo22

violetdaisy said:
It could also be that you don't really see that he's not good for you. (Not good as in there's nothing to build on that's stable) The tower is a pretty grand structure and promises safety but in this instance it would be better to be a fish in the wide open sea. He's a poor facsimile of what you're looking for but you think you know what you're getting into and are willing to ride the storm...for a while.

Hi Violetdaisy
Thanks for the reply!
I do know that as it stands he's not good for me and I am willing to fish in the open sea,but this guy seems to be built into my life. You have hit the nail on the head! He's not quite right but could be if he gave his head a wobble but no matter who talks to him he just carry's on regardless x

spookyboo22

Thirteen said:
Seems pretty obvious to me. He shakes up your world, turns it up side down. And you like the battle of words you have with him. It pumps the adrenaline, makes you feel alive and awake and alert and smart and sharp (like swords).

The Hebrew word for the Tower is "mouth" and it's related, essentially, to a "shout." It says, "that's not true!" and brings down the false tower. Meanwhile, your clarifier says that you like verbal battles (when you lay down a clarifier, you say to the deck "sorry, I don't understand. Can you say that again?" so the 2/Swords is the *same message* as the tower, just said differently). Yes, 2/Swords indicates compromise and a pause in the fighting, but that means that prior to that, there was fighting. And Swords, being intellectual and verbal, indicate a war of words and wits.

So, I'd say you like him because he engages your mind like no one else does. He erects false structures, and you like bringing them down. He brings out his sword, and you bring out yours. It gives you both a charge.

Thanks Thirteen!
You are quite right. We are always having these mental battles. He is very bullish and so am I.
When we get on its just great and I love being with him but he always spoils it.
He says crazy stuff sometimes I just can't let slide. The last biggie being when he accused me of having an affair with my boss.
I don't know where he gets these ideas from?!
He always comes up in readings as The Heirophant, not everyone's cup of tea I know
I appreciate your help x

spookyboo22

Grizabella said:
Speaking of adrenaline-----I was just thinking that maybe you're addicted to adrenaline. Don't laugh. People really do get addicted to it and when a woman doesn't have it, she feels like nothing exciting is happening----"ho hum"----and then then she instigates something that will give her that adrenaline boost again. It's a common problem for abused women. (Not that I'm saying you are.) Women who are used to abuse think they're dating somebody really boring when a guy is genuinely nice, genuinely interested in them, and genuinely capable of a good kind of love that can be grown into instead of fallen into.

I also blame romance novels and movies for part of it. In a romance novel, there's a certain progression---girl meets boy, girl can't stand boy, and from then on it's nothing but come together, fight again, come together, fight again until finally at the end it's happily ever after and he's her soulmate. That's not what really happens in real life though in healthy relationships.

So maybe you've somehow entered into a similar relationship with this guy. It's possible. On the other hand, maybe it's just a bumpy start to romance. You've known him a long time so there's enough familiarity between you two that allows you to disagree with him outright whereas if he were someone you didn't know so well, you might overlook differences and just keep quiet.

At any rate, I wish you lots of luck with this. Keep us posted. I love updates. It helps us all learn from each other.

Hi Griz!
Thanks for your reply
I know exactly what you mean. I'm not an abused woman but I've put up with a lot of nonsense in my time from men but I don't anymore .
I do get an adrenalin rush from being with him but I know when I've had enough of him and I'm gone like a cool breeze. We have a little break then we are thrown back together again because we know alot of the same people.
Thanks for not just dismissing me and him out of hand as The Tower is in inverted commas " a bad card "
I will keep you updated
You've been very kind x

spookyboo22

witchofglass said:
I definitely, majorly agree with the "nothing stable" aspect of this post. 2swords is a balancing act - the two together to me say that this is a relationship where you would have to be extremely careful to keep up that balancing act, or the whole shebang will come tumbling down on your head.

I can see why you'd feel drawn to the lightning on the Tower, but that the catalyst of destruction itself (on most versions of the card, anyway). What you perceive as chemistry and being attracted is what keeps you coming back, but that's also what's causing the disaster. To build off violetdaisy again - you think acting on that attraction is a good idea, but it's not. Better to wait out the storm and look elsewhere, because continuing to chase this guy is just going to come down around your ears again and again.

Hi there!
I agree with you but I never ever chase him. The only man I chase after is the ice-cream man

I do have to careful what I say and keep everything on an even keel you are right.
I keep my guard up with him.
Thank you for your wise words x

ana luisa

Hmm... Besides the obvious chemistry, if you put the Tower and the 2 of Swords together, it gives me the impression he is that kind of person who "sets you straight" when you need straightening. In a good sense.

He brings you back when you're a bit lost or when you overdo things. Does it make sense ?

The Tower as why I like him??

spookyboo22

violetdaisy

witchofglass

Thirteen

Grizabella

spookyboo22

spookyboo22

spookyboo22

spookyboo22

ana luisa