When MKG was talking about being jealous of her friend who had Eden Gray's book, I could so relate. When I was in college, a friend of mine called me up to ask if I wanted to take a bus ride with her to the metaphysical book shop so she could buy some tarot cards. She had been calling around and most places, if they carried any tarot cards, had 4 or 5 at the most. This place had something like 75 different decks in stock, along with sample decks you could look through and see every card. So when I accompanied her, I *really* wanted to get a deck of my own, but from some reason it didn't seem right at the time. It was her idea and I didn't want to appropriate it or be a follower.
I couldn't get that bookstore out of my mind, and eventually, maybe a year later, I went back and bought my very first tarot deck.