Is venus always the co-ruler of the female querent or not ?

Im asking because in a recent chart, i have me being mercury but then venus is in the 7th house.....and im not sure if she is me or someone else.

Turning the chart, for the 5th house we have saturn ruler which is also in the 7th house.

From what i know of co-significators... is querent gets asc and moon...and if female (maybe) venus.

Male querent gets asc ruler, moon and sun.....is this correct ?

Okay i think ive found out the answer....the female is also venus as co-significator, and the sun also for a male.

So going on a recent chart, my co significator being venus is in the 7th house meaning i'm more interested in progressing something with him than he is me.

BUT venus and his significator (jupiter) does make a sextile and also receive each other in each others domicile, so this looks like we both feel the same about each other.

The only thing is, is that saturn is in the 7th house too with venus, meaning obstacles and delays at present, to do with us.

Its his birthday tomorrow...he's a scorpio, and regardless of everything i still need to at least wish him a happy birthday, so maybe this is the sextile coming up between us.

Also in the chart, mercury my asc significator is combust the sun, showing me being hidden by him, which is true.

You only use Venus and the Sun in marriage charts (or long term relationships). I don't use them is speculative charts such as 'There's this girl I've seen, Am I going to marry her?' or 'Will I meet the man that I will marry this year?'

From experience, the couple have to know each other and be fairly close, or if it's an arranged marriage their families have to be interested in the match and beginning to put out feelers/talks. That is the putative relationship has already cleared its first hurdles.

For speculative relationships I just use the main significators.

Minderwiz said:

You only use Venus and the Sun in marriage charts (or long term relationships). I don't use them is speculative charts such as 'There's this girl I've seen, Am I going to marry her?' or 'Will I meet the man that I will marry this year?'

From experience, the couple have to know each other and be fairly close, or if it's an arranged marriage their families have to be interested in the match and beginning to put out feelers/talks. That is the putative relationship has already cleared its first hurdles.

For speculative relationships I just use the main significators.

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This is where im getting confused with what significators to use and not to use....as you yourself knowing about my situation with this guy, and him being already in a marriage. BUT also me and him are fairly close, he's told me he has feelings for me and from his actions i do believe him.

We've been seeing eachother for 5 months now....i know its not that long, but id say its long enough.

Im sure its gone past the "bit of fun" 5th house stage now, and has progressed into more....as messed up as it is.

So would this allow me to be using venus and sun also ?

Well he's still married, so a question on marriage/long term relationship where you live together is moot.

Until he divorces his wife or leaves the marital home, that remains the situation. If he does either of those two acts then a marriage/long term relationship becomes possible and then you can use Sun and Venus. But remember this is only done in a marriage horary. Any other question involving you two would still keep to the usual significators.