online readings a good practice but ...

hi all - i hope this is not too sensitive a topic but - ok, let's try. i like the fact that we have the "readings" thread here, mostly because it is great practice. i don't have a lot of time right now and therefore don't do a lot of face to face readings, so i do the online readings here. but it often feels a bit like going to mcdonald's rather than having a good, healthy, homemade meal. whenever someone asks what x's feelings are for them, i have to really work at not rolling my eyes. i guess that in itself is good practice i also often don't get inspired by the feedback. i would like to have more of a conversation about the reading (and have often instigated that, to mild success).

i also hardly ever notice the people that i judge to be more serious in their tarot pursuits hanging out in the tarot reading section. maybe others feel like me?

so ... i'm wondering ... to what degree am i just being a judgmental old lady? do i need to practice MORE not rolling my eyes? and when i'm getting to tired of that practice, where do i go other than places like ISG or CoS?

I think finding someone you click with talking about Tarot readings is like finding any other type of good friend, not easy.

Maybe if you do have someone that you found had a good connection to you on the forum, provided the kind of feedback you are looking for, either to you, or by looking at other threads, you could private message them and ask if they wanted to do a dedicated reading thread with you...but like any friend search, it might take a while, and there may be many who aren't good fit's in the mean time...but I think reaching out one on one through the forum might be an option for finding someone interested in deeper conversational exploration of the readings together.

Don't forget that if a reader wants a more in depth conversation as part of the exchange, then that can be made part of the condition of exchange. Rather than "detailed feedback," state that what is wanted is a two-way conversation about the reading with questions on clarification, etc.

The people who want "McDonalds" as you stated are going to avoid this more work-intensive exchange.

just another opinion....

I must say, I have met some wonderful people on here, who I am glad to call friends. I am a person that likes a personal approach too, but I admit that there are people at all stages along the way in their personal journey (my first feelings when I joined was, oh, we have here the weird, the wonderful, and the users, lol). They only too happy to discuss feelings and situations in order to make that tete-a-tete you favour. Don't give up. Just be open and keep trying to connect from the heart. I think we feel it, even if via such impersonal media as the internet is or can be. I always think, like with everything else in life, this forum is what you make of it. Only an open mind and empathy required....

Very best of luck! Mwah xxx

fractalgranny said:

i also hardly ever notice the people that i judge to be more serious in their tarot pursuits hanging out in the tarot reading section. maybe others feel like me?

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If you're talking about the Readings forum, it might be because that forum is for people who need help with a reading. If you're just talking about exchanges, you could be right. Perhaps you could PM one or more of those folks and see if they'd be interested in exchanging with you?

I have to admit, I cringe every time I see a reading that is about anyone other than the querent. I believe very strongly that readings should only be about the querent, for ethical reasons. You're right when you say that it's good practice trying not to judge people who only seem to be interested in one kind of question! I couldn't say whether this has to do with age. I'm 32, which could be young or old depending on who you ask, but my interest in the tarot is quite serious. I am, however, at the beginning of my journey and that's why I don't participate in reading exchanges or even try to help others on the Reading forum.

-- Meranda

I just joined--

I just joined and this is my first post, but I too would be more interested in those who wants to do a reading for me and get detailed feedback, and I can do a reading for them, which might take some effort since I'm out of practice, but I am willing to commit to it: to me, it's a great way to learn and a main reason I joined this forum. I need the practice, and think that my situation in life is quirky enough that I'd LOVE to hear what people might see in general about it. I'll find my way over to the right place soon, but now still can't even find the best way to post an intro, hence me replying here first! Good luck to us all--

fractalgranny said:

hi all - i hope this is not too sensitive a topic but - ok, let's try. i like the fact that we have the "readings" thread here, mostly because it is great practice. i don't have a lot of time right now and therefore don't do a lot of face to face readings, so i do the online readings here. but it often feels a bit like going to mcdonald's rather than having a good, healthy, homemade meal. whenever someone asks what x's feelings are for them, i have to really work at not rolling my eyes. i guess that in itself is good practice i also often don't get inspired by the feedback. i would like to have more of a conversation about the reading (and have often instigated that, to mild success).

i also hardly ever notice the people that i judge to be more serious in their tarot pursuits hanging out in the tarot reading section. maybe others feel like me?

so ... i'm wondering ... to what degree am i just being a judgmental old lady? do i need to practice MORE not rolling my eyes? and when i'm getting to tired of that practice, where do i go other than places like ISG or CoS?

Click to expand...

I feel exactly the same way, but I still will often read for people here on the reading exchange forum. Why? Because sometimes I wanna sit down with my coffee in the morning and give a few readings before I start my day... I invariably end up doing three "relationship" readings. I roll my eyes every time but when I get into them I actually end up really enjoying it. The good thing about online readings is that at least before the feedback is given, it's more of a conversation between you and the cards than it is between you and the querent.

You can also specify "please no relationship readings". And you might want to try doing one of the monthly reading circles, they seem to be populated by folks who have been reading a little longer and give good feedback.

Also feel free to PM me if you wanna exchange readings for feedback, I think we are probably interested in the same type of reading and quality feedback.

FractalGranny, I'm really glad your decided to post this question and clear the air somewhat. I'm still processing what I think and feel about it, so please bear with me as I try to be coherent.

I completely see what you mean, and throw in the serial sitters, the exchanges forum has a certain je ne sais pas. At first I wondered if I were approaching tarot all wrong, because I am interested in detailed feedback and working through the cards with the querent. But I get that section is for people who want fast, less detailed answers, mainly about relationships, and of that genre, a lot are asking "what X thinks" questions, which I am uncomfortable delving into. There are a few people who will give great feedback and *gasp* give you context, but they are not the typical readers/sitters in that section, per my experience. I am a relatively new member, so I don't know if the current vibe in that section is always like that or if it ebbs and flows. I will say, I think exchanging is a great place to practice getting questions you either don't like or are redundant. I gather it's like that in professional reading until or unless you have a clientele that will support your specialized type of reading.

As far as the more serious forum members being absent from that section, well...I don't know. I guess we should ask them?

fractalgranny said:

hi all - i hope this is not too sensitive a topic but - ok, let's try. i like the fact that we have the "readings" thread here, mostly because it is great practice. i don't have a lot of time right now and therefore don't do a lot of face to face readings, so i do the online readings here. but it often feels a bit like going to mcdonald's rather than having a good, healthy, homemade meal. whenever someone asks what x's feelings are for them, i have to really work at not rolling my eyes. i guess that in itself is good practice i also often don't get inspired by the feedback. i would like to have more of a conversation about the reading (and have often instigated that, to mild success).

i also hardly ever notice the people that i judge to be more serious in their tarot pursuits hanging out in the tarot reading section. maybe others feel like me?

so ... i'm wondering ... to what degree am i just being a judgmental old lady? do i need to practice MORE not rolling my eyes? and when i'm getting to tired of that practice, where do i go other than places like ISG or CoS?

Click to expand...

For me personally, the readings exchanges here at AT were an invaluable learning experience. I learnt so much about reading there and honed and improved my skills from the process. And got some great readings in exchange.

But for me, they were a learning tool, like the training wheels on a bicycle. I got to a point where I was sure enough of myself that I felt I could take the training wheels off and no longer needed them.

As for posting readings here, my opinion (which I know many will disagree with) is that it serves no purpose. I believe the cards speak to each of us differently and no one else can ever really understand the message that was sent to someone else. As they do not speak that language. Only the original reader can decifer it. With their knowledge and intuition and if necessary clarifiers. As it came to them. It came to them in the best way for them to see it clearly. The same message for someone else would take a different form.

The cards speak to each of us differently, which you can clearly see when someone on AT asks what a card means and there are as many different answers as their are people answering the thread.

But the meanings are others are irrelevant and can't be added in after the fact, as the message was not sent to them in their language, but to the original reader. Those are my, maybe unpopular, beliefs on that.

So that is where I am now. I don't feel I need feedback any longer I am a professional reader at the point I am at now. And my querents are very welcome to talk to me about anything about their readings afterwards.

When I need a reading done, I tend to ask an AT friend to do it. And then I still get to discuss it in detail afterwards are we are friends.

Babs

Free readings are a gift without strings . Hopefully both parties benefit . If you are not getting what you want out of the interaction you can either readjust your expectations , or seek whatever it is you need in a different way .

Relationships are what is most important to most people. When they go wrong people can be emotionally crushed , scarred for life , and in desperate need of someone to talk to about it who will understand . If the Universe gives you the skills to be there for them it's an honor .