Step 10, Part 1
RWS 5 of Swords
Book meanings:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vikki Anderson
A battle brewing…disharmony…the need to be a gracious winner…standing on cement- fortifying, strong, grounding, stable…
-Totally Tarot
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Quote:
Originally Posted by M.J. Abadie
Someone may have disappointed you, but you were expecting too much…accepting boundaries…defeat, misfortune, betrayal, and loss… period of adjusting to some kind of change brought on by distress or loss…uncomfortable process, but necessary…
-The Everything Tarot Book
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandra A. Thomson
…honoring the cycle of thought that moves from the unconscious energy to initial conscious recognition (manifestation)…inner struggles to penetrate higher planes of existence…time to move in new directions…the ability to deal with rejection, losing, and winning.
-Pictures from the Heart
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All these meanings line up with the keywords picked from step #2-3, how do they differ? They don’t, the book definitions just expand and place thoughts, and events more succinctly.
Q: what do I need to know now?
A: that this is clearly a period of changes and adjustment, ones that will aid you in years to come.
Previous meanings from past steps that do line up with book meanings:
#5- change, alteration, self-doubt, wounded, crisis, new possibilities
Swords- pain/sorrow, communication, fight/flight, anger/hate.
From step#2
I can see where my feelings are depicted as changes happen…
tired, fatigue, stillness, cold, heaviness, sorrow.
From step#3
Again the emotions are reflected as a disturbance, “feelings that it is over”, disappointment in self, “tried too hard and was invested in outcome far too much.”
Book meanings differ from my own meanings that I gave in Step #5…
Enthusiastic, progressive, magnetic.
The only thing I can think of in regards to these terms now is how I wish to end up.
Step 10, part 2
Turn each interp into a question:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vikki Anderson
A battle brewing…disharmony…the need to be a gracious winner…standing on cement- fortifying, strong, grounding, stable…
-Totally Tarot
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How well do you think you came through these changes?
I think it might be to early to tell, but am feeling rather strong on why the conflict happened in the first place. I do not feel guilty on what I have decided to do.
Do you think there will be retaliation?
There has been already. A month has passed and there has been no other. I plan on doing and saying nothing. I have already reached a decision within myself, no need for discussion unless forced.
Do you have a battle brewing in your head?
During the first couple of weeks, I did, and what I had thought might happen, did. Very spiteful behavior, but I expected nothing less from her. So the hate was very much alive those first few weeks, now I can’t say I feel any. I have worked diligently to forgive her and myself, in my head, because I have no desire to see or speak to her again.
To see her, what would that feel like?
Disturbing, lol.
I would rather not think on that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by M.J. Abadie
Someone may have disappointed you, but you were expecting too much…accepting boundaries…defeat, misfortune, betrayal, and loss… period of adjusting to some kind of change brought on by distress or loss…uncomfortable process, but necessary…
-The Everything Tarot Book
|
What did you expect from this friendship?
I suppose after many years, I just got lazy. I was comfortable and didn’t realize, rather was in denial that things had taken a nose dive. I thought this was one association I could count on, but, sadly did not do the necessary work to maintain it. I didn’t think I had to.
What boundaries were outlined for this relationship?
I’m not sure. As I said I didn’t think I needed any defenses, at the same time. I think much on my part functioned out of obligation and or guilt, I simply wasn’t sentient of the complexes involved.
How are you feeling in regards to what you have experienced?
When I don’t feel loss and sorrow in my waking life, which these days I don’t, they turn up in dreams. It surprises me a bit since I feel fine, but I guess a part of me is still working through the kinks.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandra A. Thomson
…honoring the cycle of thought that moves from the unconscious energy to initial conscious recognition (manifestation)…inner struggles to penetrate higher planes of existence…time to move in new directions…the ability to deal with rejection, losing, and winning.
-Pictures from the Heart
|
Did you see this coming?
Now I do, but a month ago, nope.
Do you see this as a chance to start anew?
Rationally speaking it makes sense, but emotionally it may take some time to adjust to this way of living. It is all very strange, a part of me doesn’t grasp it yet. I don’t think enough time has passed.
Do you see yourself as the winner?
Right now I feel like a loser, lol.
The sadness aspect of it, not in terms of competition. I really don’t see any winners in situations where there has been a break. You just do the best to move forward and do better next time.
At this step I did not feel the need or want to pick another card, but is nice to think I can do so at any time.