Help with Relationship Spread

[Soraya]

Hi everyone,

I am fairly new to tarot and to this forum and this is the first time I post something. I hope some of you more experienced readers could help me with the interpretation of an "ongoing relationship" spread that I recently did. Here's the spread:

1. past history of the relationship: Queen of Cups
2. my past experience in the rel.: 9 of Wands (reversed)
3. my partner's past experience in the rel.: 10 of Wands (rev.)
4. my current position in the rel.: Empress
5. my partner's current pos. in the rel.: Page of Cups
6. The rel. in the present: 10 of Cups
7. What I might experience in the future: Knight of Cups
8. What my partner might experience in the future: Ace of Cups (rev.)
9. Where the rel. is heading: Hermit (rev.)
10. What may happen to the rel. in the future: 4 of Cups

Basically, most of the spread is clear to me: our relationship is very emotional (in the positive sense) - all the cup cards. We have had some struggles and problems in the past (the two Wands cards). Currently we are very happy (Empress, Page of Cups and 10 of Cups).

However, I am not sure how to interpret the last four cards, especially the hermit and the 4 of Cups. (I hate the 4 of Cups! It keeps coming up in my readings.) This outcome does not look particularly encouraging to me. Any ideas what it could mean? I would appreciate any suggestions.

Thanx
Soraya

 

[Soraya]

Oh dear,

I just noticed that this thread should have been posted in the personal readings section. Sorry!

Soraya

 

[MeeWah]

Soraya: This is the correct forum for your topic; however, the duplicate of this is being removed.

 

[destinyawaitsme]

Well, the Ace of Cups rev. and the 4 of cups kind of support the same theme: Not realizing what you have because you are too busy looking elsewhere. This can happen by being self-absorbed, or just plain not realizing what you have. I wasn't really familiar with what the Hermit rev. could mean so I looked it up in a book,(Seventy-Eight Degrees of Wisdom, by Rachel Pollack, in case you wanted to know) and it indicated that the card in that position could indicate a need to be with other people. I usually don't use reversed cards because I am not that familiar with them so anyone else's opinion would be appreciated.

 

[Lilliana]

The four of cups can suggest dissatisfaction with what you have. Also apathy and boredom. The hermit reversed can sometimes mean withdrawing and isolating yourself to avoid other people. There are other interpretations of course, so please don't stress (I could be way off )

Perhaps the direction you are heading in now will lead to a temporary break from each other. I get the feeling your relationship is extremely close, possibly so close that you or your partner could feel stifled by it in the future. Sometimes too much closeness in a relationship can get clustraphobic. This could also explain the four of cups, when we have too much of a good thing, we don't appreciate it as much any more.

Another thing I noticed was that your position in the relat. came up as the empress and your partners as the page of cups. The empress can represent a mother, and pages frequently represent children or young people. Maybe your relationship has a sort of mother/child aspect to it, where you play the role of the mother and your partner plays the child.

Perhaps the hermit reversed is trying to tell you that you will both need to have some time to yourself to sort out how you feel, otherwise you will become bored (four of cups).

Anyway, This is just the feeling I'm getting, and I could be wrong. Other people may have a different interpretation.

Lilli

 

[tiger lily]

What I noticed immediately was the Empress (the Mother archetype) and Page of Cups (the child, also, emotional immaturity) coupling. It seems that you are enacting a "happy family" (10 of Cups) relationship which is not really satisfying for you, because you are forced to be the "adult", the rational, responsible partner, whereas your partner has the freedom that you secretly desire.

The Knight in the future indicates that you´ll revolt against this mother-role. the Knights are adolescent, "teenager"-types, the Fire aspect of their suits: the Knight of Cups is Fire of Water, hot, steamy emotions ;-) passionate and romantic.

Your partner will probably not be very happy with this development (Ace of Cups (R) ), since it bursts the bubble of the 10 of Cups. According to Pollack, the Hermit (R) can indicate a Peter Pan syndrome, a refusal to grow up and become responsible for oneself - this can relate to your "youthful rebellion" and to your partner´s Page of Cups personality simultaneously.

The 4 of Cups *could* mean disappointment on both sides, but the 4 is the number of consolidation, too, so perhaps you´ll sail into calmer waters soon

 

[Soraya]

Thank you all so much. So I was reading the cards correctly, even if I don't like it. Yes, it is true that my husband and I are extremely close and our relationship does have a lot of "childish" elements. (Even though to the outside world we are both responsible adults, between ourselves we often act like little kids). I can imagine that we'll have to do something about it in the future.

I also feel, painfully, that it is true that I am mothering him in some ways and that he accepts it with youthful joy. That's not the way adult relationships should work.

I think that in the long run it is dangerous to be close exclusively to one person and I will try to do something about it (see more friends separately from my husband, take up hobbies of my own etc.) so that we do not get bored or fed up of each other with no other options to turn to.

 

[Lilliana]

Glad to help

Actually I sort of understand your situation. I was in a relationship a few years ago which was really close. We were with each other constantly and even shared many of the same friends. At first it was heavenly, but then became *too* close. We would argue and there was alot of tension. We decided to have short breaks, just afternoons and weekends away from each other every so often and it worked wonders.
Seriously, it made me really appreciate his quirks so much more. I would miss him heaps!
Anyway, you don't have to separate or do anything drastic. As you said, just seeing different friends by yourself or having different interests.

I wish you guys all the best

Lilli