Natal Charts and Relationships

[olivia1]

How much stock do you put into the natal chart's of your significant other and deciding whether or not things will work out? Is it really wise to be turned off by someone based on their planetary positions. I ask this because recently I had an astrologer help me with interpreting my boyfriend's natal chart. I chose my boyfriend's chart as the chart I wanted to study and get to know in depth for my chart interpretation studies.

I always assumed that my boyfriend was just a cold and inconsiderate person overall. I assumed his warm, charming exterior was just a result of his gemini ascendant mask. According to the charts, he is actually capable of being loving- we just bring out the worst in each other. I don't know whether I should end the relationship over this information, however, I do think the chart seemed pretty accurate.

 

[Minderwiz]

The birth chart is an indication of a person's potentialities. Whether those potentialities are realised is not predetermined, merely probable depending on the external influences.

Your boyfriend's chart may well indicate potential incompatibilty but I'd be reluctant to stress that, unless there was clear evidence from you that that was indeed the case. You also need to realise that people change and adapt, the birth chart is not a development plan from which no deviation is allowed.

Chart interpretation is an art, and Astrologers (very much including me) can get it wrong.

So you need to make a judgement about how capable he is of expressing himself in a loving relationship with you. Your own feelings about him and his likely response are at least as important if not more important than what his chart shows. If both of these coincide you have your answer. If your feelings and instincts are that your boyfriend really loves you then you have to weigh that against the chart and an Astrologer's interpretation. You might think about getting a second opinion in that case. Both from another Astrologer, but also from other friends who see and know about your relationship.

 

[Nevada]

Relationships are tricky with or without astrology

They rely on attraction, compatibility, choice, and trust.

I think a natal chart can only show certain things, and that's not always the whole package when it comes to relationships. A lot of what makes a good relationship is the choices we make regarding what we can live with or not live with in a mate, and the concessions we make to each other, as well as the trust we build over time. (Attraction is the easy part, IMO.)

There are cycles of behavior that we can get into that are like feedback loops. If you see your boyfriend as cold and unfeeling, but he's not, then either it's your wrong perception or his lack or subtlety of expression that is to blame -- maybe both. If something he did gave you the impression he was cold and unfeeling, and then you treated him as cold and unfeeling because of that, and he in turn decided he couldn't trust you with his feelings, then he might behave and seem even more cold and unfeeling as a result. This could build over time into real problems.

It might take a shrewd astrologer to see that in your charts, if they can see it at all, and I suspect they'd have to look at both your charts, rather than just one.

 

[olivia1]

The birth chart is an indication of a person's potentialities. Whether those potentialities are realised is not predetermined, merely probable depending on the external influences.

Your boyfriend's chart may well indicate potential incompatibilty but I'd be reluctant to stress that, unless there was clear evidence from you that that was indeed the case.

Yes, there was evidence. It was surprising just how accurate the natal charts were (the astrologer compared my chart and his). The interpretations moved me. Something I never felt with tarot or any tarot reading I ever had before (as far as revealing relationship dynamics past) It was like that lady witnessed all our interactions and wrote about it. There was nothing vague about what she said at all. What she said evoked really strong feelings because it reminded me very vividly of things that happened in the past between us. It made me more determined to learn to interpret natal charts for myself.

You also need to realise that people change and adapt, the birth chart is not a development plan from which no deviation is allowed.

Thanks, this is what I needed to hear. The chart interpretations were so spot on I actually believed that maybe planetary alignments had a stronger influence than I imagined.

 

[olivia1]

I think a natal chart can only show certain things, and that's not always the whole package when it comes to relationships. A lot of what makes a good relationship is the choices we make regarding what we can live with or not live with in a mate, and the concessions we make to each other, as well as the trust we build over time. (Attraction is the easy part, IMO.)

There are cycles of behavior that we can get into that are like feedback loops. If you see your boyfriend as cold and unfeeling, but he's not, then either it's your wrong perception or his lack or subtlety of expression that is to blame -- maybe both. If something he did gave you the impression he was cold and unfeeling, and then you treated him as cold and unfeeling because of that, and he in turn decided he couldn't trust you with his feelings, then he might behave and seem even more cold and unfeeling as a result. This could build over time into real problems.

It might take a shrewd astrologer to see that in your charts, if they can see it at all, and I suspect they'd have to look at both your charts, rather than just one.

Such wise words, Nevada. I think you are right. Your understanding of psychology amazes me. AS for the astrologer, she read both of our charts. I didn't ask her to predict the future, more so much his personality. I wasn't sure if he was able to express emotions or not. That chart gave me so much insight into his personality, it was amazing.