AnemoneRosie's Readings

[AnemoneRosie]

Preamble: I'm in a really bad mood right now and my head is loud. So it's time for an extra gentle deck - a Doreen Virtue special. Consequently I'm using my Goddess Guidance Oracle and it's just a basic 3-card spread focused on what's happening to my mood and how can I work on it within a past/present/future framework.

So. Here we go.
Deck: Goddess Guidance
Focus: What's happening and how can I remedy it? What do I need to know?
Past: Sulis - Bodies of Water: Spend time near water, such as a lake, river, or the ocean, to recharge your batteries.
Present: Isis - Past Life: This situation involves your past-life memories.
Future: Guinevere - True Love: The romantic stirrings in your heart have propelled the universe to deliver great love to you.

There is a significant tie-in between these three cards for me. Isis is telling me about what's happening with my mood; I'm more triggered than I'd anticipated and consequently I'm not giving myself either enough credit nor the opportunities to heal that I deserve. I need to rely on Guinevere and her reminder of love - especially self-love in order to really find any improvement.

Sulis is a good reminder for me that I always find water soothing. The creek near my house is very low right now (we've not had much rain since August) and so it isn't as satisfying for me as it otherwise would be. I went and rode my bike by the lake today. It was nice and I was in a good mood then. Of course it didn't last as I then needed to go inside. It was dark when I left and so I couldn't see the water. So part of my current unhappiness has to do with my being in a bit of an emotional desert right now.

Isis just confirms that part of my misery has to do with seasonal triggers and stressors. While that's hardly surprising (I always struggle with this time of year) it's also a message that I always forget. I don't like that I reliably fall apart every year and try very hard to keep up a determined optimism. That's exhausting and exacerbates the situation. She knows this - but do I? Not really.

The solution is more and better self-care. While that's easy to say it's an area that I find enormously challenging. That said I start a new yoga group on Monday evenings so maybe that will help in the loving myself department. Guinevere reminds me that, rather than being harsh and hard with myself, if I can show myself patient tenderness then I'm more likely to get the results that I'm looking for.

I find it telling that the colours go from cool Sulis into even colder Isis before coming to the warmth of Guinevere. It's only once I can achieve a form of self-acceptance that I'll really be warm. And in order to really accept myself and learn to love myself I need to get past the coldness of my past experiences.

 

[AnemoneRosie]

Deck: Arthur Rackham Oracle
Draw: Intermperance - Lack of self-control
Message:
I thought that I was doing well in this area. The cards clearly don't think very highly of me. After all, I do good things like go to therapy, go to yoga, deal with my hips even though it'd almost be easier to just give up my ability to walk than to keep fighting for it, etc...

But it's true that I'm also a disaster in this area. I've stopped being active even though I can still swim and lift weights. I could re-join tai chi because I liked it. I could eat better (the last time I bought food was late August, with one notable exception where I made soup at the end of October). I could learn how to turn down work and focus on school. I could prioritize. But I'm not.

I can always do better. While it's fine to pat myself on the back I shouldn't rest on any laurels, either.

 

[AnemoneRosie]

Tell me about tomorrow

Deck: Arthur Rackham Oracle
Spread: School/Work/Life
Draw: Distraction / Machination / Connectedness

Message:
Distraction: Diversionary Tactics. Having this drawn as School really sums it up for me. Exams are next week (my first is in six days) and I've yet to start studying. I have a lot of reading to catch up on, too - a whole half-semester's worth for two classes! I have three exams in three days as well as the work-place dinner. So it'll be hectic and I really need to get a move on. But I can't as there are so many other things that I both need and want to be doing!

Machination: Unreliable Associates. This card shows an impling and a human girl who looks to be quite upperclass - but who appears to have fled. It's likely that the impling is bringing the girl deeper into the forest away from her family. If I get a tast that allows for me to be on my own tomorrow at work I'll be quite happy. Alternatively, if I'm so tired that I start to hallucinate that could be an issue. I don't really have time to recover from such fatigue. The sunset and the mushrooms in the picture tend to suggest hallucination. I'll be glad when the job is over, at any rate.

Connectedness: Empraced by the natural world. I love the image of this card - the tree almost turns into a merman at the roots. However, it also takes a turn as maybe the girl is more imprisoned than she looks. The natural world definitely has me enthralled as I cannot go for long without being in it; it's been over a week. Perhaps this is yet another encouragement for me to take up running. The weather is clear, my bra has arrived, I have shoes and appropriate clothing. Even if I simply run along the ravine for a little while I'll have made some progress. Since no one seems to particularly concerned about my health I'm going to take that as the all-clear (Fuzzy will disagree with me, of course). But it strikes me that this card is telling me to go outdoors.

It's curious to me that Distraction starts in town, Machination draws the girl further into the natural world, and Connectedness really emphasizes being without civilization at all. Are the cards telling me that I'm a wild child?

 

[AnemoneRosie]

General

Deck: Arthur Rackham Oracle
Draw: Coercion (Leaving Behind); Intimidation (Inappropriate Tactics)
Message:

Oh my! Well, this is a rather dark spread!
I know what's going on and yes, it is rather dark. It's bleak and it's exhausting and on top of that I have exams. I wouldn't have thought that the cards would pick it up, though! That's both wonderful and wonderfully disheartening at the same time.

She's coercing me, and I'm using intimidation as a result. These are both dysfunctional. So we need J to figure out the way forward. I hate relying on a mediator but I'm exhausted and I don't know what else to do.

 

[AnemoneRosie]

Deck: Earth Magic
Spread: Cover / Crossing
Draw: Volcano: Volatility / Tree: Grounding
Message:

I'm experiencing a time in my life where volatility is to be expected. This is a time of change and so naturally it involves some tension. Sometimes things get heated and sometimes things get out of hand. Because this is the natural course of things at this time it's understood as being a natural part of the process. It's okay for me to feel this way sometimes.

The opposite card is indeed, the spread's opposite. The tree is the antidote to the volatile time. However, the tree cannot grow while the volcano is still erupting. The tree needs to wait its turn otherwise it too will be sacrificed. The tree knows that in order to flourish it needs to wait a little while for things to run their course. It will be time for the tree soon enough, just not quite yet.

 

[AnemoneRosie]

Deck: Earthbound Oracle
My brand new deck and I’m in love!
Also, it’s amazing how insightful it is, even in this initial interview.

Tell me about yourself - Fear (reversed)
Interesting that the first card drawn was a reversal. I was thinking to myself when I was shuffling “you know, I’ve never understood -before handling this deck- how it was that people end up with reversals as a part of the shuffling process. I get it now! Other cards are simply too big for my little hands (even though I often don’t see my hands as being particularly little, but my body is only 5’ tall and I’m proportionate, so).

Anyway, so this deck is Fearless. By that I take it that this deck is willing to take on some pretty tough topics. We can go anywhere and it won’t shy away. Like the hare that keeps on running from the hunter’s arrows this deck will keep on going regardless of what I put it through. That’s a pretty tough challenge, and one that I’m absolutely up for. I need a deck that can keep pace with me and, thus far, I haven’t found one. Which flows nicely into…

How can we best work together? - Luck (reversed)
… it seems that my luck has changed. We can best work together by acknowledging that we are, on some level, equals. Luck has nothing to do with it. There is hard work and perseverance (the card below this one in the layout) involved. Both with the creator of this deck who got it to me, and with me in getting to this point where I can bond so readily with these cards. We can best work together by honouring what has gotten us here as well as where we’re going. Luck has nothing to do with it and it’s wise to remember that.

What do you want to know from me? - Guide
I exist to guide this deck forward. Our relationship can grow and mature over time, but ultimately I need to take the lead. The cards don’t read themselves, after all, and are perfectly content to talk amongst themselves should I wander away for a while. In order to go with me on my journey I need to bring them with me.

What can I learn from you? - Fire
This deck contains passion and life. While I used to be quite fiery my fire has since gone out. This deck can help me to keep myself rekindled, which is something that I often need and quite often lack.

Any card that you want to show off? - Perseverance
Perseverance. I’ve been thinking about this word lately, and about how I tend to read it as containing severance. It contains the idea of letting go, as well as of keeping on going. It’s been a challenge for me over the past few months to keep on going even though I desperately want to. This deck is letting me know through this card that it is here to help me keep on going.

Anything else that I should know? - Terra
This deck can be a grounding force for me, as well as a kindling one. It seems to grasp the dual struggle that I have, both with being grounded as well as being passionate. I easily fall into either sadness or anxieties (cups and swords) but the fire needs to be on earth. It doesn’t burn well in the air, nor does it burn well in water. The fire needs the ground and, because I often lack it, I cannot burn as brightly as it seems that I should be able to.

This deck believes that it can help me with this. But do I?

 

[AnemoneRosie]

Deck: Earth Magic Oracle
Spread: Cover/crossing, focusing on self-care post in-laws' visit
Draw: Wolf: Instinct / New Mon: Promise
Message:
Wolf tells me that I'm on the right track. That whatever I need to do is alright. I can go off on my own (be the lone wolf) if I need to, and that's ok. I'll still be able to join the pack when I'm ready to do so. The answers that I need are inside of me, and so I need to remember to focus on my intuition.. It's the one that knows me best and, of everyone, has my own interests in mind.

The New Moon shows a couple looking out upon the water at sunset from within a fenced-in enclosure. It actually reminds me of the Islands in the summertime. It says that I can rely on Fuzzy to look after me, too. Not only are they his parents, after all, but he cares. And, while he's not married to me, there's still that expectation of promise after nine years together. It says that everything will be ok, and that he's there to help me get through it together. I'm not entirely the lone wolf after all.

 

[AnemoneRosie]

First Attempt at mystiche kipperkarten

So, because I believe that the best way to learn something is to dive in whole-heartedly, I'm learning how to use Kipper cards by doing a GT. Because of course I am. However, going forward I'd be well-served to read the card meanings before jumping in.

Deck: Mystical Kipper

Theme Cards: Bereavement, Rich Girl, Hope. Big water. It seems that I cannot go on the way that I have been. I need to say goodbye to my illness that I worked so diligently to accept. I need to say goodbye to who I have been and who I could have been in order to become the Rich Girl, full of Hope. I need to watch out for the pitfalls of Hope by getting caught up in the illusion. Only then can I have the full wealth that is my due. The intersection of Bereavement and Hope is focused on the chronic nature of the illness that I wrestle with. Only through acknowledgement, part of which is healing, can Rich Girl become a possibility, rather than an aspirational idea.

Above Main Person is Prison. This is in development. I wonder if it references my upcoming voluntary retreats, either Newfoundland, Paths of Courage, or both. It serves to reinforce the warning of Hope. The illusions can be imprisoning, and turn me even further away from Rich Girl. This is reinforced by the observation of how Main Person turns toward Rich Girl with her upper body even while her lower body walks the other way, toward her solitary Journey.

Present
To the Right of Main Person is A Journey. It is quite literally my going to Newfoundland, and my going to Paths of Courage. Both of these are serious journeys that, while I'm striding toward them full tilt, I'm not fully acknowledging. They will have an impact on me, and I'm still in denial about that. Instead, I'm still dreaming about Rich Girl, and who I might have been. I'm caught in the Bereavement, and can't yet accept the Hope on the horizon.

Future:
The Future for Main Person is Rich Girl and False Person.
Rich Girl represents the Future. However, she almost seems to represent the ideal, as it would take a lot of work to get to that point! Perhaps she is to be aspirational, or to give me inspiration. Instead, I find working toward her exhausting most of the time. I'd almost rather wallow in oppression. The presence of False Person reinforces this. I may work my butt off to get to Rich Girl, but I can't fully get there. She's an ideal, and she isn't for me. I may not like it there anyway, even though she could have been my fate. Instead I will need to forge my own path. My upcoming trips to Newfoundland and Paths of Courage will help me to clarify all of this in my life.

Past:
Below Main Person is Rich Good Gentleman, and A Change. There has been much upheaval in my life. These two are inextricably intertwined with the shadow cards below as the past, for me, comprises one large shadow. I both need to cope with this, and yet I resist it. There is so much positivity in these cards! Yet I cannot see it in actual fact.

Shadows:
No matter how one looks at the shadows they seem to be positive. They acknowledge the Short Illness, and take it in stride. The cards acknowledge through A Long Way that the Short Illness is anything but. However, simply because it's chronic doesn't mean that it isn't also insurmountable, in that I can learn to live with it. This is, in fact, the central theme. There are Gifts, a Rich Good Gentleman, Gaining a lot of Money, and A Change. It requires change to see all of the good in the world, rather than simply focusing on the ailments that stem from the illness.

Further detail:
Diagonal lines contain Great Happiness above Main Person, with Gaining a Lot of Money, and Marriage, below. Interpersonal relations are not a huge priority of mine. They have the side effect of increasing my wealth, but neither of those are primary concerns for me. Instead, I'm more focused on the joys found in Great Happiness and I derive that from neither the people in my life nor the wealth of the world around me. Instead I gain it from the act of being alive. Life is the Gift.

 

[AnemoneRosie]

Winter Solstice Reading

From Little Red Tarot. I'd thought about doing this with my Moon Oracle, but to be honest I'm tired and hungry and I couldn't be bothered. So instead I went with the Earthbound Oracle. The theme card that came out was Release. This winter solstice will be all about releasing negative thoughts, negative habits, and negative energy. It will be about finding ways to remember that the glass is half-full, or if that cannot be done, about finding a smaller glass so that the water fills it more fully.

1. Where you stand ~ Fire

The energy around me is all-consuming. It fills me, and it eats me alive. It changes me. It overwhelms me, and becomes all I know. This energy is vital to my existence, and yet using it to exist changes me into something that can't. This energy takes me over. This is the passion that keeps me connected to this planet and to the people who inhabit it. It's the creativity that I require to cope with existing on this planet. It's the spark of life that created me, and it's what keeps me here. It's larger than I am, and I would do well to remember that.

2. Something to leave behind ~ Death

I suppose that my process of change is not yet complete. And yet, the transformation is mostly there. All that can be consumed has been consumed (or close to it) and now it's time to move forward. It's time to see how I can gather up the pieces and use them to not only create something new, but to create something better than what was there before. I can't change what's happened, but I can change how I move forward from it, and this is an ongoing process.

3. Something to receive ~ Time

I'm allowed to take all the time that I need in this process. This is time on a cosmic scale, not a human one. All I can do is my best, even when my best looks decidedly pathetic from the outside looking in. So I can give myself acceptance of that. Others have granted me the time and the space to find that acceptance, and to heal on my terms. So it's up to me to receive this gift gracefully.

4. Something to learn ~ Obfuscate

The past year has taught me about self-protection. Like Death, the image of this card is full of smoke. I can use it to my advantage, as others have used it for so long against me. Yet just because I'm good at it that doesn't mean that it's always the best choice for me. I can pick and choose what I hide, and what I reveal. It doesn't need to be all one way or the other.

5. Something to give ~ Permanence

As I go I can offer the world consistency and stability. There is a possibility that I am one of the most permanent fixtures in someone's life. However, it isn't just me. All that I give and all that I create lives on after me. When I write to people, it lives on. When I draw for someone, it lives on. Those pieces of me that I live behind can become something real for someone else. This is powerful motivation for me to remember that it's okay to take up space in the world; someone else might be relying on me to do so.

6. Your hopes and dreams ~ Wisdom

The next phase will see me become more confident in who I am, and more capable of sharing it accordingly. I don't yet know how to provide the message accordingly, and it's something that I hope to learn. My hope is that I become more self-aware, and so am better able to tailor my output so that it becomes even more cherished and permanent for those who receive it. My dream is to be received with grace, rather than dismissed. I hope to become more adept at listening to my inner wisdom.

7. Your secret special skill ~ Message

The resource that will most help me on my journey is my intuition. When I remember to listen to it I do so much better than I do otherwise and the magical thing is that there are messages everywhere! My special skill is that I'm capable of being receptive to such messages, of incorporating them, and of allowing them to assist me in moving forward. My challenge is to remember that, and my goal is to integrate that into my daily life.