Doubting myself...feeling vulnerable after a break in

[Disa]

I'm not sure whether this is a discussion for chat or for spirituality. It feels as though my spirituality is shaken, so I have posted it here.

Yesterday someone kicked in our front door in broad daylight and robbed our house. None of the people in the family were home, the last had left just 15 minutes prior. The critters are all safe and sound. Not many physical "things" were taken. The quick action of the alarm company and the police are probably the reason for the quick exit of the robbers.

I'm sure this is common for people who have been robbed, but this hasn't ever happened to me, so I don't know. I was in state of shock, disbelief, and denial yesterday afternoon and when I realized some of the sentimental things that were taken I just felt very hurt. Every time I look at the destroyed door frame I feel extremely violated. The DH has restored "saftey" to the door as much as can be restored, but the house feels icky.

So, along with what are probably all the ordinary feelings of a home being broken into, I am feeling the whole "What kind of psychic am I if I didn't see this coming?" thing.

I have felt uneasy for an entire week, the feeling of doom I usually get just before something horrible happens(it's usually a death) which I can never put my finger on. I've had an intense, constant headache since last Sunday night, so 6 days (which I haven't had these in over 2 years) that no amount of sudafed, advil, excedrine, anything has touched.

Was this physical stuff my alert signal and I just couldn't perceive it?

Why did I not sense this?

The night before the break in I had a horrible dream in which my husband was injured and I couldn't find out which hospital he was in...was this dream an indication of something that was going to shake my foundation? (Luckily my husband is safe and he kept us safe last night by restoring the door frame and the alarm system.)

Right now I feel numb and a little shaky inside... Unsure of myself and my spirituality, unsure of the humanity of people. Wondering why they picked us? How to prevent them from coming back for more stuff, now that they know everything we have.

They were in our living room, in my daughter's bedroom, in my bedroom, that's as far as they got. I'm going to clean everything today - open the windows and suck the air out of the house through the attic fan- I don't care if it's cold outside. And I'm going to smudge the house with sage... other than that, I just don't know. I suppose the protection powder I had placed across all the entrances didn't work? Or did it? The lives of the people and pets were all saved... the entryway to our home was not.

I really don't usually share this much because I don't want to burden other people, but I really did not know who else to turn to-especially regarding the spiritual/psychic side of things.

I really appreciate the opportunity to share and to get it out of my system so I can begin to build myself back up some how. I've got to regain control over my sense of well-being, and be strong for my daughter who slept all night with her light on.

If anyone made it all the way through this lengthy post, thank you so much for taking the time.

Blessings,

Disa

 

[Bhavana]

oh you poor dear. I understand completely. When I was a teenager, we were robbed by three men that followed my mother home from Atlantic City (they must have thought she won some money). After my mom fell asleep on the sofa with my dad, they came in and cleaned us out - my brothers and I all asleep in our bedrooms - luckily we all shut our bedroom doors at night - but I wonder, did they open any of the doors and look in on us?? Creepy. They were still in the house when I got up at 5am and took a shower because when I went back into my room to get dressed, my purse, my jewelry box, and the alarm clock that had just woken me up were gone.

For days we were finding our kitchen knives around the house - they didn't come with weapons, but armed themselves after they broke in. The police said that someone who comes into your home while you are there would not hesitate to hurt you..... "professional" robbers wait till you are out, they don't want to run into you - but the reckless ones, they don't care, they'll come in when you are there - and they are the ones you have to worry about.

For weeks I almost felt I had been raped, that our house was dirty, I even went to stay with my aunt for a while. It shatters any feeling you have about being safe in the world. You realize that you are really never safe anywhere.... but the feeling does subside.....it just takes time. Our house was trashed, how they made such a mess without us waking up I will never know. We also had sentimental things taken - jewelry that my grandfather had given to my mother etc - and yes THAT DOES MAKE YOU ANGRY (In fact, I am still pissed about that) but none of us were hurt, and neither were any of our animals (the dog was in bed with one of my brothers, who said he growled and barked a few times, but my brother thought nothing of it, just figured he heard something outside and told him to shut up)

Don't blame yourself that you didn't see this coming. If every psychic person knew everything, you'd all be winning the lottery every day. It was enough that you had a bad feeling and dreams in the days leading up to this - but you can't blame yourself for not being able to prevent it. Bad things are going to happen, and sometimes you just can't stop them - you are not superwoman!!! I felt really bad for my dad after our robbery, because being a man, I think he felt doubly worse that he did not protect his home.

These horrible feelings will subside. Get a better door, be thankful for the alarm system, say goodbye to those things that had sentimental value, hope they wind up in a "good home", and just be thankful that things didn't turn out worse. I do understand exactly how you feel. Believe it or not, my family laughs about some of the memories of that robbery now - like how when the cops were looking around and came into my very messy bedroom my Dad said "Oh, no, they didn't come into this room, it ALWAYS looks this way". Also, since my parents were asleep on the couch, the robbers used their bedroom as a "base" for operations - they dumped everything out onto the bed: drawers, contents of the closet, everything - and in the center, in the midst of this awful mess, curled up in a ball, was our big lazy tomcat Sam, who had probably been snoozing there the whole time these guys were dumping stuff around him. He was even still there when the cops arrived. We imagined him waking up to watch the robbers, then yawning in boredom and going back to sleep. Nothing - I mean NOTHING - bothered that damn cat!

Hope you feel better soon -

 

[Gia]

I am HURTING for you! What a horrible experience and I would be concerned if you weren't having ALL the feelings you're having right now!!!
First...you can ask your local police dept to send someone to your house to give advice on areas that may be vulnerable...so you can amp-up protecting yourself.
But when goons show up and kick in your front door...there's nothing you can do.
Nothing.
I joke about the 'why didn't I see that coming...I'm a Psychic' thing allllll the time.
We are meant to know some things...and not others. It's simple as that. Maybe by keeping you in the dark, your spirit guides were protecting you from being home and being assaulted!
It's ok to question and ask 'why'...but...at the end of the day...the reasons aren't important...that you are safe and unharmed is.
Sending you healing and protective white light...

 

[Est]

Disa, I'm so sorry you and your family have been through this What a horrible experience. No wonder you're feeling shaken - it's very understandable. (((((((((( Disa and family ))))))))))

I don't know enough about psychic abilities to offer any meaningful comment there, but I do know that when something makes us feel vulnerable, it opens the door for a whole lot of doubt, anxiety, fear and even self-criticism or blame. Be aware of that possibility, and be very gentle with yourself as you heal from this damaging event.

Holding you and your family in my thoughts and prayers

 

[raeanne]

Hi Disa,
I also know what you are going through. My house was broken into several years ago. Some teenage boys broken in while we were all out of the house. I totally understand that "icky" feeling. I did the same thing you are doing - cleaned and aired the house completely. I was mostly bothered by the fact that they had been in my bedroom. I washed all my bedding. Getting the back door repaired and new locks installed helped some. But, time was the biggest help of all. As for the psychic side of things, I think that was perfectly natural. If you had never been robbed before, how were you supposed to know that the messages you were getting meant "I'm going to be robbed"? Even if you did know that your house was going to be broken into - what would you have done about it? How could you have stopped this? Would you stay home every minute of every day? Sometimes there are things that happen that we just can't prevent. Be kind to yourself! Thank goodness you and your family are all OK. Peace to you!

 

[PAMUYA]

I am so sorry. Your feelings are normal, and I believe I would be doing exactly what you are doing. Your personal "kingdom" has been violated. I stopped someone from breaking into my home a few years ago at 3 AM and we were all home asleep in our beds. My dog which was in the garage due to rain, woke me up. I scared him off and call the police. It took me months to feel secure again, although to this day I do a lock check before I can close my eyes at night. My dog gets a special treat and hug daily for protecting us.

Hugs to you and your family.

 

[Disa]

Thank you all for sharing your stories, insight and words of wisdom.

I have finished cleaning and saging the entire house. putting sea salt and protection powder at every entryway and the driveway etc... IDK. It makes me FEEL like I'm doing something to restore the balance. Even if the protection is all in my mind, so then are the feelings of being "un-protected" so it all works out, eh?

We've already joked a little because our 7 lb attack poodle probably stayed right in my daughters bed looking like a stuffed animal while the whole thing was going on. I wish he could tell me "WHO" did this.

We are so very fortunate that the damage was minimal. I do realize we have this to be thankful for. We had already taken EVERY precaution a person could take to protect our home, but honestly- if people want to get in then they will- and they did. It isn't about the strength of the door, the number of locks, etc- they kicked in the door frame, which in essence separates everything. There is absolutely NOTHING we can do to keep them out. I just have to get on with it, and continue to practice safety measures to the best of my ability.

Be safe everyone. Any many thanks to each of you for helping me through this. I really do feel a whole lot better now

Blessings,

D~

 

[Grizabella]

We're only given what we're meant to know and I don't believe we're meant to know everything ahead of time. That dream you had may have been saying, "Something bad will happen but just be thankful that his life will be spared and everyone will be alright, which is what's truly important." It may have been given you to look back on later and be thankful for.

I understand your feelings very well. In my past, I always let "things" keep me from leaving badly abusive relationships and finally, it culminated in a life-threatening situation where I lost everything three times in a row, till finally I could walk away from it all with just my life and my daughter's life and be grateful. I always thought "well, he has to leave. I can't leave because I'd lose all my 'stuff' to him."

Things are just things and, while I understand the pain of losing irreplaceable things, the bottom line is that it comes down to what's really, bare bones important and that's our lives and the lives of our loved ones. There truly isn't any real material security in this life because it can all go up in smoke in a minute, but being spared life and the life of our loved ones is the true treasure. Once that fully sinks in, then it's so freeing. Learning that you don't need all that to survive and that most of it is given back many times over in the long run is a gift.

Everything is part of the overall plan for our lives. We can't see everything, and we can't prevent everything. That's why I do believe in fortune telling. I don't necessarily believe a fortune teller could have predicted what happened to you, but I do believe there are things that can be seen and that can't be changed by changing our actions, like what happened to you. What could you have done if it had been foreseen? If you'd been forewarned and laid in wait for them, you might have been hurt or killed. As it happened, you were oblivious so they just came and took some things and left your family unharmed.

I hope nothing I've said is offensive to you. I truly am thankful you're all okay. That's all that really matters. Do whatever can make you feel a little better in your home. That's all you can really do. Best wishes for a happier future for you all.

 

[Disa]

Griz, I agree with every single word you've written. Thank you so much for your time, concern, and input. There is absolutely nothing there I find offensive. I always appreciate your perspective on things.

Happy New Year to you,

D~

 

[Milfoil]

I'm so very sorry to hear that this has happened to you Disa and understand those feelings of "why didn't I see this coming". Looks like you did get some indication though.

Thank you for sharing this trauma with us, having been broken into several times, I can relate to everything you've said. The feeling of being singled out, watched, treated with such disrespect etc are all feelings I know from past experience especially when they broke in while we were away on holiday (2 days after leaving) so they knew. The biggest issue there was that the thief probably knew us to know that we wouldn't be at home then. How do we trust after that?

Sounds like you are doing everything you need to do. Clean house both physically and spiritually then allowing yourself the time and space to feel what has happened in order to move forward with it as an experience which strengthens and informs you rather than one which is hidden away and undermines you.