OshoZen; 6 of Water (Cups)

Briar Rose

OshoZen; 6 of Water (Cups)
The Dream

I totally disagree with what the book reads about love. To me, it sounds like the writer has had no expereince of being in true love.

I don't feel that wanting to find your soulmate means you can't stand being alone. We don't come alone into this world. We aren't hatched. Actually, there is someone there giving birth to us. So, to me, that always was a silly statement. And hopefully, if you've lead a fullfilling life you won't be alone when you passover.

Could you imagine teaching what the book reads about this card to an impressionable teenager?

We're meant to fall in love, and we're meant to me social creatures.

No one will make us happy all the time, and no one will answer all our needs all the time, but I can be damn sure when I am in love, I will.

Judith D

I also find the words to this card very offputting and incorrect for my viewpoints. Being alone is very different from being lonely, and I certainly didn't fall in love with my husband because he was 'beautiful' but because of what and who he was/is. Loving him has not made me avoid myself, in fact quite the opposite. We make a whole, but we also stand alone as individuals with our own likes, dislikes, etc. I am not afraid of aloneness - in fact I relish it at times, when I can have peace and quiet and do what I want. I do not expect him to deliver all my happiness, although my happiest times tend to come through him, even after more than 30 years together.
This young lady, shown dreaming of love, or romance rather, may have a rose-tinted view of romance because of her youth and inexperience, and she may have overinflated ideas of what it will mean, but how sad if we could not have dreams. They can show us our aspirations.
All my activities do not reduce to fear of aloneness. In fact, with my studies, my cards, my other interests, I am never 'very alone'. I wonder, though, whether young people these days, with the computer age, dvds, games, etc, do feel lonely and fearful when they are deprived of all that sensory stimulation. I grew up learning to do things for myself, be by myself, invent things to keep my mind and hands occupied. Very few these days do handcraft, for instance, and I find things like that keep me sane!
There are definitely those who fall in love with money - but I cannot see how that equates to avoiding aloneness, as misers frequently keep to themselves to avoid anyone getting a share of their goodies.


There was a time not too long ago when I REALLY loathed this card, but as I have gone along I understand what it means to me.
I have been one of those people who have had way too high expectations in the field of love. Yes, I did expect someone else to make me "whole", and I wasn't one of the lucky ones who found that.
Am I bitter? No, absolutely not.
Have I gotten to know myself better, especially my shadow side? Yes, I have.
I admit, I do and have had an Electra complex all of my life, but that doesn't mean that I didn't truly love the men I was involved with (who were older than I) at those times in my history. I love who I love. I DID feel alone/lonely when I was single (still am single), but I have been able to tackle some very important issues for myself. I feel that I have made some real strides in becoming more comfortable with being single, really enjoying my own company and such.
I agree, being with someone is great, and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for the person that I'm in love with, but as much as I would wish to make him happy and complete...only he can REALLY do that, and only I can truly do that for myself as well.
So this card has really opened my eyes, for myself and my life/love pattern. I also agree that one must have a dream, but in my case, I have to take care of a few other things first before joining with another.
Hey, that's just me, ok, don't get me wrong:)


I agree with this card. I've lived long enough to know what it means and to have lived what it's talking about way too many times, so I understand it.

There really isn't someone else who is going to make you whole and fulfill all your dreams. Only you can do that and realize that. And it's only once you understand this truth and arrive at that place that you can have a relationship that's the most healthy and fulfilling. Until then, you're emotionally needy and looking for someone else (or something else) to patch up the holes in your soul.

I'm not throwing stones at those of you who dispute the book or the card. I'm not saying you haven't found that one person you were meant to be with. I'm only speaking in general terms here. But don't throw this card aside and pooh-pooh what it's saying. It's a great truth that's being expressed. Someday you may understand it better. :)

Briar Rose

I guess I just didn't get this card. As a kid, my parents were't good example setters as far as emotions go.


I used to panic if a relationship ended. I couldn't stand being alone. My motto was: The best remedy for one broken romance is another one. Seriously. And I lived by that, exactly. If I broke off with someone, I'd go seeking another one frantically immediately, even if I had to sift back through romances clear back to high school days and contact someone out of the blue. It didn't matter to me that he was an "ex" for a reason.

Every man I dated was the one potentially. A one-night stand became the possible man of my dreams and I just knew he was in love with me---or would be shortly. I'd go to great lengths to convince him that I was the woman of his dreams. Without a man I was nobody. If I had been into tarot then, I'd have been consulting my cards constantly to see if he was the one and what he thought of me.

If I was with someone and they threatened to leave me, I'd do anything and become anything no matter how against my nature it was just so they wouldn't leave. I'd make excuses for them and accept any b.s. justification they had for their bad behavior and I'd even take the blame on myself for "making" them do what they did that wasn't acceptable.

It's a long, sordid story and I think a lot of people are caught up in it, even if not to the extreme that I was. That's what this card is about. The notion that we aren't whole and worthwhile without another person.

Alan Ross

Regarding this card, my view is similar to Lyric's and squeakmo9's. I've pretty much been a hermit most of my life. Growing up feeling rejected by parents, rejected by peers, I've pretty much settled on a solitary path through life. I'm still hoping to find someone to share my journey with, but I understand this card. It is tempting to imagine that I can find someone with a guarantee stamped somewhere that she will be with me forever. But the guarantee doesn't exit. I have found a few willing to share my journey for a short while, but then they take a different fork in the road and I'm back to my solitary trek. I have found myself wanting to jump into a relationship just to avoid being alone. I have learned that that is not a good basis for a healthy relationship.

It is also tempting to hope that I can find the right person to complete me. It is so difficult to hold on to the realization that I'm already complete. I agree with HeavensVault that we are social creatures, meant to be with each other, but we are also pretty adaptable. The stoic philosopher Seneca compared a man without a friend to a man missing an arm. Can you be happy without an arm? Yes, it is possible. You can lead a very satisfying life minus one of your arms. Is it preferable? No. I would rather be with someone I love and who loves me. But I can be okay with being alone.

I would like to add that, although the message of this card is a good one, it is somewhat overstated and shrill. I'm wondering if it reflects some particularly painful experience that Ma Deva Padma has been through?


Alan Ross said:
It is also tempting to hope that I can find the right person to complete me. It is so difficult to hold on to the realization that I'm already complete.

The message of the card is that we really are already complete. Therefore, there isn't any need to complete ourselves and it's impossible for another human being to do what doesn't need to be done.

It's true that it's a normal human urge to seek a mate. But that mate is someone to walk beside you through life, not someone who will complete something that doesn't need completed. Namely---you. :)

I think the reason Ma Deva seemed to hammer the idea home is that the idea we need someone else to complete us causes so much misery for people. Needless misery. Think of all the people who go through life trying to find someone else to "complete" them and then getting their hearts broken when the person they thought could do that lets them down. And think of all the children who are results of unions like that who suffer terrible emotional harm from it.

We're not someone lacking an arm if we don't have someone else. We may be lonely. We may hear a biological clock ticking regarding having children. We may be sexually frustrated. But we're not incomplete as we are. We're simply feeling emotions and physical sensations that are normal to someone who is without a life's partner.

The life partner we really need is another person who is complete and knows it. And the best way to attract that partner is to realize and accept our own completeness. :)

It's a paradox. If we "need" somebody, then the very last thing we need is somebody. And when we quit needing, then we'll find somebody who is truly our partner.

Judith D

Very very interesting to see this card from both sides. What all the opinions are reminding me - teaching me - is that although my own perception may be different, it could very well be that this card in a reading would indicate exactly the opposite view to my own.
Maybe the fact that I cannot personally agree with the message given to explain the card is meant to show me how lucky I am to be where I am and to remind me it took quite a while and much work to get there.

Alan Ross

Lyric said:
We're not someone lacking an arm if we don't have someone else. We may be lonely. We may hear a biological clock ticking regarding having children. We may be sexually frustrated. But we're not incomplete as we are.
I think the point that Seneca was making is that we have a choice. If we lose an arm we can be miserable about it the rest of our lives, or we can be okay with it and not allow it to be an impediment to happiness. The same is true when we are alone. We can be miserable about it or we can be okay with it. Our choice.

The lack of a significant other doesn't have to prevent us from finding fulfillment in other ways. I'm sure none of us would choose to be without a special someone in our life, just as none of us would choose to be without one of our limbs. Missing neither makes us, the person we are inside, incomplete.

I tracked down the specific quote. It actually mentions an eye and a hand, not an arm. But hey, a body part is a body part, although some parts I would rather do without than others ;). Here it is:

"Nevertheless, he [the wise man] desires friends, neighbours, and associates, no matter how much he is sufficient unto himself. And mark how self-sufficient he is; for on occasion he can be content with a part of himself. If he lose a hand through disease or war, or if some accident puts out one or both of his eyes, he will be satisfied with what is left, taking as much pleasure in his impaired and maimed body as he took when it was sound. But while he does not pine for these parts if they are missing, he prefers not to lose them. In this sense the wise man is self-sufficient, that he can do without friends, not that he desires to do without them."