I think my deck gave me a blunt, harsh, scold-like answer the other day. While it's true I haven't done a reading in months, I don't think it was about that. The cards were really accurate, really down to the situation at hand. Upon looking at them, I finally got convinced I have a good hand for drawing tarot cards, because all of the other readings I've done were a little unlikely until they came to happen later. But this one a couple of days ago was unbelievably spot on, without having to wait for any confirmation.
The thing is, what the cards told me exactly what I do NOT want to hear. I just can't accept it, yet the reading is so aligned with everything that's going on in my life that my boyfriend had been telling me the same things the cards did. This has never happened in my life. Then again, I haven't done a lot of readings, to be fair.
I'm planning on changing my major to Engineering, out of a need for validation and respect from others because I can't bring myself to respect myself and demand my own space in life. Low self-esteem and whatnot. Perhaps this is the wrong reason for a decision like that? At least this is what my boyfriend's been telling me — and he's an Engineering undergraduate student.
In the Celtic Cross I did, cards came up like a reversed Queen of Coins, reversed Page of Coins, Ten of Cups (looks cute, but CC position #4), reversed Magician, upright Two of Swords, upright Eight of Cups, reversed Emperor, reversed Knight of Cups, reversed High Priestess... Basically: “Be careful not to become a selfish, spoiled, lazy, gold-oriented name-dropper! If you choose to go with this tough decision, you'll undergo a big transformation, but going this path means letting your emotions run your life and losing touch with your wise, honest self. You might be disappointed in this decision, you little brat. Don't manipulate people with a title you don't even have yet! Don't pick the easy way out of your psyche traps and scars! This is a bad investment! Also this means leaving behind your own family in order to study harder, or out of conceit. Turning your back on your recovering father and your dependent mother. How can you do this, you asshole?! No. I'm not recommending it. I say you stay the hell away from Engineering. That is my advice to you, and you do whatever you like with it.”
I was like,
.