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Beancrew49's Avatar
Beancrew49  Beancrew49 is offline
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One thing I'd like to add to this conversation is in response to the people who say, "You should respect the rules of the house." I think this is nonsensical. Sure, if the rule is no smoking, that's something that should be respected as it has an effect on the people who live there. That I agree with. But as far as pursuing Tarot, something that harms no one, you are free to be the person you are meant to be. Just because someone allows you to live somewhere, that does not mean they own you. Just because someone gave birth to you, that does not mean they can tell who what kind of person to be. If you allow other people to suppress who you are, then that WILL eventually manifest into disease on the physical level. Be who you are, unapologetically. If using Tarot will get you kicked out of your house, then do it quietly, but never change who you are for someone else.
Top   #41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tanga View Post
D'you think things might have been different if you'd say "Aha! - the artwork of Lady Frieda Harris, a wonderful painter during the 2nd world war... colourfully re-interpreted by yourself?". ?
No, his attention span wouldn't have been long enough to absorb all that!
Top   #42
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beancrew49 View Post
One thing I'd like to add to this conversation is in response to the people who say, "You should respect the rules of the house." I think this is nonsensical. Sure, if the rule is no smoking, that's something that should be respected as it has an effect on the people who live there. That I agree with. But as far as pursuing Tarot, something that harms no one, you are free to be the person you are meant to be. Just because someone allows you to live somewhere, that does not mean they own you. Just because someone gave birth to you, that does not mean they can tell who what kind of person to be. If you allow other people to suppress who you are, then that WILL eventually manifest into disease on the physical level. Be who you are, unapologetically. If using Tarot will get you kicked out of your house, then do it quietly, but never change who you are for someone else.
And what of a 12 y/o ? a 10 y/o ? Should they call in Children's Services, when forbidden to have cards ?

You can actually BE the person you were meant to be without owning actual things as a part of that. Parents don't own their children, but they do have some rights over what items are allowed in their home. You don't have to suppress who you are - just wait to own cards - or keep them at a friend's house.

I remember someone here discussing how her father used to beat her over stuff like that - and as she said - she never blamed him; he did it out of love and was genuinely trying to protect her from something he "knew" was evil and harmful. Parents have a right to be who they are too.
Top   #43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gregory View Post
And what of a 12 y/o ? a 10 y/o ? Should they call in Children's Services, when forbidden to have cards ?

You can actually BE the person you were meant to be without owning actual things as a part of that. Parents don't own their children, but they do have some rights over what items are allowed in their home. You don't have to suppress who you are - just wait to own cards - or keep them at a friend's house.

I remember someone here discussing how her father used to beat her over stuff like that - and as she said - she never blamed him; he did it out of love and was genuinely trying to protect her from something he "knew" was evil and harmful. Parents have a right to be who they are too.
And this way of thinking is exactly why we've perpetuated a cycle of repression leading to physical disease. The sooner in life a child learns to be themselves, the better. If that means acquiring a Tarot deck when your parent is so wrapped up in religious dogma that they can't see clearly, then good. It is a step in the direction of an authentic self. Did you really just bring up the threat of beatings in an attempt to suppress the idea of living an authentic life? The sooner a child can break away from their parental idea of who they should be, the sooner that child will discover their higher self and be able to make this world a better place, rather than continuing a cycle of repression that has keep this society sick, both mentally and physically. If buying a set of cards is the catalyst for that change, then who cares about the wishes of people trapped in mental prisons?
Top   #44
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I agree that we all have a right to be who we are, but there's still respect for your father that's important. You can be who you are without disrespecting his rules.

I'm an alcoholic in recovery, so for the first years of my sobriety, I didn't allow alcohol use in my house. Later on, it wasn't such an issue but back then, it was very important to me and I appreciated that my wishes were respected.

Even if you're an adult, you still need to respect the house rules if you're living with someone else. I have a sister who is very religious and when I stayed with her, I had a deck with me but I never used it in her presence. My son-in-law is Jehovah's Witness and is extremely against Tarot. My daughter has cards and uses them, but just not around him. When I stayed with them before my move to where I live now, I had cards with me, but I was very discreet at that time, too.
Top   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beancrew49 View Post
And this way of thinking is exactly why we've perpetuated a cycle of repression leading to physical disease. The sooner in life a child learns to be themselves, the better. If that means acquiring a Tarot deck when your parent is so wrapped up in religious dogma that they can't see clearly, then good. It is a step in the direction of an authentic self. Did you really just bring up the threat of beatings in an attempt to suppress the idea of living an authentic life? The sooner a child can break away from their parental idea of who they should be, the sooner that child will discover their higher self and be able to make this world a better place, rather than continuing a cycle of repression that has keep this society sick, both mentally and physically. If buying a set of cards is the catalyst for that change, then who cares about the wishes of people trapped in mental prisons?

I agree that personality suppression can lead to dis-ease.

However - if in such a situation one's full expression might be risking harm to oneself in the process. (what if Dad beats me up or throws me out on the street? I know some people this has happened to - just as gregory.)
It might be prudent to bide your time and wait until you can move out and have your own space and your own rules about what you do in your own home.
When you are more secure yourself (and it takes time to work that bit out) - then you can confront your parent.

"who cares about people trapped in mental prisons" Well you would if they are your parents that you love, and you are presently relying on them to support you. (and even when you're no longer relying them).

I object to you accusing gregory of "bringing up a beating in an attempt to suppress the idea of living an authentic life" - that IMO, was not her intention.

I think perhaps caution in encouraging someone else (with no real background on the situation at all) to
have a tete-a-tete with their family.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Barleywine View Post
No, his attention span wouldn't have been long enough to absorb all that!
Top   #46
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tanga View Post
I agree that personality suppression can lead to dis-ease.

However - if in such a situation one's full expression might be risking harm to oneself in the process. (what if Dad beats me up or throws me out on the street? I know some people this has happened to - just as gregory.)
It might be prudent to bide your time and wait until you can move out and have your own space and your own rules about what you do in your own home.
When you are more secure yourself (and it takes time to work that bit out) - then you can confront your parent.

"who cares about people trapped in mental prisons" Well you would if they are your parents that you love, and you are presently relying on them to support you. (and even when you're no longer relying them).

I object to you accusing gregory of "bringing up a beating in an attempt to suppress the idea of living an authentic life" - that IMO, was not her intention.
Part of the ascension process is to release fear. Living in fear of reprisal for being yourself leads you off of that path. Of course we are still living in a society filled with fear and hatred, so navigating though this society takes some tip-toeing by those of us who wish to transcend it and each case is different and should be handled differently, but the fact of the matter remains. Fear of being yourself is not in your best interest. Maybe that beating, or being thrown out on the street is The Tower that you need to grow. Living in fear of what could happen, and using it as an excuse to not be true to yourself, is not in alignment with the Universe, so I take offense to the idea that one should live an unauthentic life for fear of a beating.
Top   #47
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beancrew49 View Post
One thing I'd like to add to this conversation is in response to the people who say, "You should respect the rules of the house." I think this is nonsensical. Sure, if the rule is no smoking, that's something that should be respected as it has an effect on the people who live there. That I agree with. But as far as pursuing Tarot, something that harms no one, you are free to be the person you are meant to be. Just because someone allows you to live somewhere, that does not mean they own you. Just because someone gave birth to you, that does not mean they can tell who what kind of person to be. If you allow other people to suppress who you are, then that WILL eventually manifest into disease on the physical level. Be who you are, unapologetically. If using Tarot will get you kicked out of your house, then do it quietly, but never change who you are for someone else.

Thank you for this. I'm not harming anyone by doing Tarot. I'm going to continue to do it because it doesn't affect anyone in the house. If it did, then of course I wouldn't do it. I love them very much. It makes me feel guilty to keep it secret. I wish I could just be myself. It's all pretty silly, and I also feel it is controlling.
Top   #48
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beancrew49 View Post
I take offense to the idea that one should live an unauthentic life for fear of a beating.
I'm sorry, Beancrew, I have to disagree with you in very strong terms here. Yes, as adults, we need to live authentic lives. But we're talking about someone who is dependent on others, and who could come to serious harm without their support.

I also disagree with the notion that being your authentic self means disregarding the views and needs of others. We are all connected. Individualism keeps us isolated and vulnerable. Being authentic means recognizing that we are not islands; we need each other. And this means that we need to consider the feelings and opinions of others in the choices we make.

Being part of society isn't just about fear and hatred. It's about understanding and acceptance. Sometimes people make poor choices and desire inappropriate things, and we need to help each other identify appropriate boundaries.

Parents are responsible for their child's well being, and most of us want the best for our children. We make the choices we do out of concern for them and from the basis of often long experience.

When you live under someone's roof, you live by their rules, so long as those rules are fair and reasonable (even if you disagree with some of them).

Strangers on the internet should not be trying to drive a wedge between parent and child.
Top   #49
Tanga's Avatar
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Beancrew49 View Post
Part of the ascension process is to release fear. Living in fear of reprisal for being yourself leads you off of that path. Of course we are still living in a society filled with fear and hatred, so navigating though this society takes some tip-toeing by those of us who wish to transcend it and each case is different and should be handled differently, but the fact of the matter remains. Fear of being yourself is not in your best interest. Maybe that beating, or being thrown out on the street is The Tower that you need to grow. Living in fear of what could happen, and using it as an excuse to not be true to yourself, is not in alignment with the Universe, so I take offense to the idea that one should live an unauthentic life for fear of a beating.
You can take offense. OK. But it's not your call IMO to make for someone else.
Expressing it as your view OK. Presenting it like the absolute truth that should be followed - another thing.
Obviously a sensitive subject here.
Top   #50




 


 


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