Icky feeling when potential Readers suss out your previous questions?

[gregory]

Fool. START OVER for god's sake

 

[zhadee]

I do know what you mean about "demanding".

When I first came back in 2011 I think it was - I use to get PMS left, right , and centre asking this and that about readings. Follow up questions etc. Stalkerish behavior, but that soon came to an end as I learnt not to answer.

And sometimes when a reading was done a sitter would just go for gold when really speaking it should have been just feedback. This mostly happened in my earlier days, but a few time since as well.


Example:

"Thank you so much for the reading. Do you see us together in the future? Do you see us getting married? Are we soul mates?

And guess what? The reading indicated that it was "over" not a "happening future". Put in a very clear way - not in a way to put that person down.

So, sometimes sitters to "not accept" what the answer is and they continue to "push" by "demanding more" by "asking more".

Boundaries are important and that is why I like the AT rules for "readers" as it really does put a stop to that kind of nonsense and keeps the flow of this website.

It is not about "judging", but not wasting time, energy, and effort.


DND

DND, I've also seen readers not accepting what the cards say by giving incongruent responses. To me, this looks as if instead of giving the cards' messages their reply stems from the whole range of bad experience to wishful thinking.
Some questions might not need a spread, and some answers appear not to originate from the cards chosen.

 

[Barleywine]

Fool. START OVER for god's sake

I don't know, there's a place for Fools and their acolytes in the world. Just not here. Maybe in politics?

 

[DownUnderNZer]

That is another issue I reckon. When an "answer" is not accepted.

I disagreed with a reader once on AT and not being familiar (still not AT savvy) with the rules I asked about it in my own thread. That was corrected fast and rightfully so!

Later it worked out that that reader was "right" - like months down the track, but at the time I was not ready to listen and it was not as bleak as it got following that reading. Took about 6 months of the "Reading Exchange" to put it behind me.

And actually it was another reader that said it one day in a thread to me: "6 months should be enough and by then a person should move on".

Absolutely right. The sooner you put it behind you the better I reckon. My only regret was not doing it sooner.



DND

DND, I've also seen readers not accepting what the cards say by giving incongruent responses. To me, this looks as if instead of giving the cards' messages their reply stems from the whole range of bad experience to wishful thinking.
Some questions might not need a spread, and some answers appear not to originate from the cards chosen.

 

[Sharla]

I too "occasionally" look through any previous posts the sitter has made, and this is usually when i think they're maybe lying about their feedback, or if they are repeatedly asking the same Q.

As sometimes you notice that the "stalker" sitters will jump from thread to thread to thread to thread.......until they get the answer they want, and this is usually the wrong answer anyway. BUT because this person has told them what they wanted to hear, they get praised and told how gifted they are at reading cards etc....its so funny, but also not at the same time.

And its sooo irritating when you put so much effort and time into someones reading, as you want to try and help this person, and you maybe get a "Thanks" if your lucky. Then you can guarantee within seconds, they will have already jumped onto another thread asking exactly the same question.

 

[DownUnderNZer]

That seems more like pulling straw out of ones butt, sugar coating, or prejudged readings based on ones own experiences which are not resolved.

Should one be reading then if they cannot be impartial? I think not.

DND

DND, I've also seen readers not accepting what the cards say by giving incongruent responses. To me, this looks as if instead of giving the cards' messages their reply stems from the whole range of bad experience to wishful thinking.
Some questions might not need a spread, and some answers appear not to originate from the cards chosen.

 

[DDwarks]

I'm actually pretty saddened by this thread.

The OP asking for us to be banned for doing what we think is right for ourselves, calling us arrogant for having boundaries and suggesting we should be grateful we're being used is nothing short of telling us we're reading slaves.

A kind of " thats why you're on here, leave your rights at the door".

But shes the one insulted?

The only thing I'm taking from this thread is that my readings' small prints needs to be stricter.

I had already noticed Zhadee asking sitters to have the courtesy to say "Hi" or in her own words "acknowledge my human condition" which I shall ask for too.
Im not an object to be used. Im a human being....not a commodity.

Also this thread hasnt been a conversation.
Where are the members only ever using the exchange threads asking tbe same things all the time?

We've given our opinion wheres theirs?

I agree with Gregory about the awareness issue. We were already aware of the misuse of Rex.

Have you Bonny become aware of it too and if so where do you now stand on your insulting accusations?

 

[G6]

Personally, I sometimes take a look at a sitter's history to give myself some context, and that's to do with the way that I view how Tarot works. It's not a magical window onto the universe's secrets, but a window into my own subconscious. So I need something of a 'where is this person coming from'.

As for asking repeated questions - fine up to a point, but remember that a forum is kind of a conversation, and in any conversation, it gets pretty boring if someone asks the same question or chimes in with the same story you've heard ten times already. And in close succession, it seems rude to the person who read for you.

In individual reading forums that's not such an issue; I know I tend to circle back to the same concerns, because I regularly feel a bit 'stuck' in life.

In shared threads (such as the 'one card, one sentence' game) it's really a little inconsiderate to keep asking the same thing.

There are some really wise people on this forum. Not only card-reading wisdom, but life wisdom, and it frustrates me to see people close off their ears and ignore their advice. I wish I'd had their counsel when I was younger - it would have saved me much pain.

This is a nice post.

 

[G6]

This:






Bonny I am so sorry that you have been hurt.


And - I do believe the reader should have the right to read through a sitters past threads (as this is an open forum) and make their own decisions on that basis. Best perhaps - if they’d not given a reason maybe…or might have managed a way to say things softly. But this is sometimes tricky (and in some cases sugar coating).


If the querent is repeatedly asking the same question - it is no longer to learn (I've done it myself consciously) - it is because the querent is stuck-in-a-rutt and at some wall-of-desperation to find a choice that is more palatable than what they've got available.
The querent - IS in upset.
And for the reader - it can be an energetically draining/frustrating experience…Upsetting too.
Difficult waters to navigate.


There's a spread for that "Finding the Pattern for repeating questions"...
If only I can find it now...

This is a constructive solution to offer these folks a reading/spread on repeat questions. Good idea.

 

[G6]

We "profile" people when we are face-to-face, whether it is scanning their "being" locally, observing their posture, their body language, their eyes, their voice, the way they speak, etc... as humans, we learn that certain behavioral patterns, movements and even physical traits can sometimes tip off to other traits. As such, we scan this "public record" in person all the time. In fact, this is where the bulk of reading energy goes imo, is this daily maintenance of scanning for threats, learning through curiosity, digging for facts and information through conversation of new and interesting individuals, etc... very innate to our whole being.

We don't have these markers readily available online, so that's why we have post history and a public record of sorts as a minor "blueprint" to the "internet persona". In fact, that's how our intuitive senses are typically trained to be engaged, which is using this "blueprint" as a trigger... and actually I think of Tarot as a symbolic way of re-creating this same blueprint in my mind. Showing what is manifested/manifesting underneath in some interpretable manner. I can't think that reading someone's post history is more penetrative than allowing someone "in" when they pull cards, tbh. Especially if this energy/information was made publically available to all to scan. Myself, I see energy and feelings through text, so scanning this text sometimes jump starts those otherwise instinctual processes, but I don't usually go through backlog unless I am tipped off to something...

So if people screen me, no it does not bother me. In fact, curiosity is a sign of good mental health and often sound critical judgement in my eyes. In other words, I think it's "smart" to investigate your senses if you feel you may be dealing with a muddy reading as a result of a repeat-a-querent, rather than sitting back on your thumbs and ignoring it entirely. At least it's smart to engage this in order to "tune" your guidance systems to see if they're working or not. I think that's really the main purpose of energy used for reading anyway, which is to self-protect/self-maintain/self-facilitate one's path, etc. Not necessarily to do readings for others. Those are a "bonus" as a result of experiencing good energetic health and having achieved personal growth, imho. Knowingly allowing this energy to be misused goes against my moral code as my practice is centered around maintaining the spirit's health and this internal guidance system.

With this forum being a learning forum, it's very difficult to be too picky about the types of readings/treatment we receive here, and for the same reasoning it's very important to screen as a reader. We have to allow for some indifference with respect to this being for "educational" purposes and all. However, like someone mentioned on the past page, I do get physical headaches as well from muddier readings. It's usually a result of repeat queries and often means the "message" has already gone through... nothing more to snuff out. Not all exchanges will be up to our particular liking, at least not as far as free readings are concerned. If you're looking for a true professional, top-rate customer service which offer privacy, then paid readings are more your venue. Actually on the subject of being an education forum, I think that that is partially why some people keep asking over and over... because 1) It's an learning forum so mixed-results are expected 2) Free readings may potentially be self-detrimental as they hold less value to us in some ways since we didn't pay for it... so maybe some subconscious sabotage on some part on our side that prevents us from fully absorbing or taking on board the full exchange. Since technically we don't feel they're worth paying for, so maybe they're worth in some ways in our refusal to pay (or lack of ability to)... is a thought... That's what I figure anyway, is the mental reality of at least the more well-intentioned repeaters... whether they realize this or not.

Let's look at this another way. Suppose you pay for an in person reading and the reader wants you to bring in your diary to read before they decide weather or not they will read for you or let's say they are going to be paid to read for you, but they need to know word for word about every conversation you've had with every single one of your friends on the topic before you sought a reading with them. Is this necessary to simply read the cards?