What is 8 swords for sexual relationships?

[SirRushing]

I'm still pondering over how a man could get a woman pregnant without her knowing it. I can't figure that one out although women do sometimes get pregnant without the man wanting them to.

And of course sexual bondage comes to mind.

But for me there would have to be a combination of cards that would indicate what the 8 of Swords means.

Well, not every woman is on the birth control pill, so a guy putting holes in condoms can happen, especially since he knows that the condom is the only birth control the woman is using.

Also, put an oil "lubricant" inside the condom in order to erode the latex. Lots of people have gotten accidently pregnant because they ran out of an oil base lube, and decided to use the cooking oil or baby oil as a substitute. Well, oil erodes the latex making sperm able to leak out.

 

[SirRushing]

Like most cards in Tarot - this could serve as a warning only that they will feel trapped by the relationship and/or will fear trying to get out of it. It is easy to read 'Whips, chains, S & M, The Story of O, etc.' into it, but that is something the Querent will probably fill in themselves.

Then again, getting tied up and whipped might be right up their alley ....

Mostly what you said would be a good interpretation for romance in a relationship when regards to 8 swords with the feeling of being trapped or fear of trying to leave out. For example, a woman not divorcing an abusing husband, because she fears not getting much legally (financially) through the court system, or she fears the social shame of being a divorced wife/mother than a woman free from abuse.

But sexually? Which is a more physical interpretation for the card. Let me think about it...

Perhaps a person using sex to trap someone into the relationship, or make them fear for leaving....maybe this is about blackmailing someone to remain in a sexual relationship with you, regardless of them wanting to leave it.

For example "If you break up with me, I will sell the nude photos/video you made for me to a porn site. And the whole world assume you were once a porn star and see you perform sexual acts. If you don't leave me, I won't do this. You are forever mine and you ain't going nowhere. I refuse to see you be with another man/woman."

 

[SirRushing]

First of all, quick question...

How is having someone become dependent on you and "addicted" to you on your list of positives? That strikes me as a blaring negative, and an extremely unhealthy relationship. Are you saying you (or the person you're reading for) WANT to become frighteningly dependent on the other person, or that you WANT the other person to become frighteningly dependent on you?

With that being said, since you're obviously not into the possibility of S&M-type stuff (since that was listed as a negative on your list) I can definitely say that I'd interpret this relationship to be extremely unhealthy and "bad," to use your word. Any number of possible scenarios could apply here, but all you need to do is take a look at your own list. You only came up with one possible positive (which I really think you need to reconsider as a "positive") and 4 possible negatives.

You already know the answer to your question. The possibility of a sexual relationship here is not a good choice, plain and simple.

On sight, 8 swords does seem like a negative card. But I've had some good experiences with negative cards, which has forced me to do a positive and negative interpretation on a card. For example, everyone thinks that 2 Cups = love and romance and comradery. And all that good stuf...WRONG! I've gotten 2 Cups when I am arguing with someone, because to be honest 2 cups = exchange of emotions among two persons, whether the persons hate, or love each other.

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To go further into the situation of this card...

Yes, the card is about me, concerning a man I met in April, but I haven't seen since. Recently, I just discovered his home, and perhaps work address and I was thinking about writing a short letter, only based on if the tarot cards could tell me if he would be interested in being contact with me, or not.

Oddly, enough when I did went to the library a month ago, and did tarot on a book called The Sexual Tarot Key (some book from the 1960s), I asked what is his sexual fantasy of me (and I didn't take this interpretation so seriously, because fantasies can be an imagination thing that doesn't mean you will want to act out...like a woman fantasizing about getting gangbanged by 20 men, but not actually trying to make it happen.)

And the reading said...

What are his deviant fantasy of me (5 swords)...

Degrading sex; penis destruction; vaginismus; dishonor; sexual loss; sexual deviation; rape, gangbang, threesomes. The conquering Phallus.

And I laughed at it at the time, because I have had fantasies of "degrading sex, rape and threesomes" when I fap-fap, but you won't be seeing me get in Craiglist's trying to find a man to pee on me. (I am not into that anyways. I am just trying to be funny." So I was like, meh, he got fantasies, so damn what, and I don't know which fantasy he has about me, since it could be any of the above. For all I know, he could fantasize about a threesome, but not rape. How am I suppose to know what he is into?

So yeah, I was shocked when I saw the 8 swords in the spread a few days ago. The whole spread was this (and please don't comment on the other cards, since this thread is not about spread interpretation. I just included in there so you can see the "big picture" of the 8 swords card. If you want to comment on the other cards, then private message me. Thanks)

His desire concerning me?... 9 Cups
What type of romantic relationship he wants with me?... Strength
What kind of sexual relationship he wants with me?... 8 Swords
Overall relationship he wants with me?... 6 Wands

When I met him months ago, he seemed like a gentleman. He didn't come off as a creeper, nor mean-spirited. Especially, since when we met, I was surprised that he was talking to talk to me, since he wasn't my type and I didn't think I was his type either (he was extemely Yuppie-WASP-y, and I am artsy-fartsy), so I became really shy from being shocked that he was trying to flirt with me, and oddly, he either took offense to my shyness, or he felt that I was too overwhelmed by the flirtation, so he backed off and left me alone. So, if he was truly rape-y, and a weirdo, he would be turned on by the "power" of me being shy and nervous?

Unless the 8 swords represents my shy-ness or fear (nervousness) and he wants to have sex with me in that state?

And I thought I was getting someone normal....until this reading. S&M sex...I am not down for, unless we are talking about it being like Madonna's "Justify My Love" music video, which sensual erotic with people dressing in S&M clothing. But "Hell no" with hogtie-ing, spankings until the skin blisters, and being a human toilette. No ma'am!!!

 

[Sar]

- S&M and Domination and bondage sex.

Yes, with you as the sub.

 

[ana luisa]

If the question was What kind of relationship X WANTS, I would also see S&M immediately. However, the 8 of Swords is to me a card of FEAR and SUBMISSION, but not necessarily in a S&M context. Maybe X wants them to be the quiet subdued and dependent partner who is afraid of taking initiative. In any case, I can't imagine anything good with this card UNLESS it's accompanied by another one that turns it around a bit.

 

[werewolfmoon]

The Eight of Swords says s/D to me, or bondage, if that floats your boat, go for it.

 

[PAMUYA]

If someone wants to have a 8 swords sexual (not romantic) relationship with you would you think automatically that the relationship is bad?

I am trying to remain objective so I am trying to figure this out with the positive vs. negative.


Positive:
- Sexual commitment, or addiction. Like you feel that you got the person sexually hooked and they are not going in anywhere and won't leave you. Like saying you "p*ssy- or d*ck-whipped somebody."


Negative:
- They want to trap you in a relationship with them, and usually the entrapment is of ill-gotten means, like man slyly gets a woman pregnant without her knowing, or the woman gets herself pregnant without the man knowing.
- Rape? Sexual activities that could get you in jail (if 8 swords = prison/jail)
- Trap a person to have a relationship with you by having a baby and using the baby as an anchor to keep the person in having a relationship with you.
- S&M and Domination and bondage sex.


What are your experiences with this card in regards to sexual relationships and sexual activity?

8 of Swords and a sexual relationship, I would take this as this is the only way to have any kind of relationship, they have settled. They feel trapped in a loveless relationship. My experience with f### buddies relationship is someone always gets hurt... this card expresses this. If they leave they lose the partner, if they stay no love. I have never had this as a happy ending card, or positive healthy relationship card. This card leads to mental suffering.

 

[MistressMorrigan]

I really think you're confusing consensual S&M play with actual dangerous, illegal stuff. If he's into all that (which, as you tell me more about the situation, I really think he is) then that doesn't mean he's going to rape you or hurt you. If you gave off a vibe of being not into him, his sexual fantasies and possible interest in BDSM doesn't mean he's a rapist or an abuser, or some other kind of criminal. If you acted like you weren't interested in him, then of course he's going to back off and find someone who is.

Being into all that stuff doesn't make someone a "creeper" or a "weirdo" or "rape-y," and if you ever read for other people, I would really be careful about judging things and lifestyles you don't understand, and using those sorts of words. Even messages here... You never know what the lifestyle choices are of other people, and you obviously don't know a whole lot about this particular thing, so I really suggest finding a more diplomatic way to describe your uneasiness with the types of fantasies and sexual desires you're talking about. A lot of people would be deeply offended by that sort of thing.

But regardless, you've made it clear that you're not interested in any of that, so while the rest of the relationship may seem promising, the sexual aspect could become quite the obstacle, something you can't get past. Whether it has to do with S&M or whether it's something completely different, it's going to get in the way of your happiness with him. I definitely think you're better off finding someone who's a little closer to your own wavelength. I think the word you used was "normal."

 

[SirRushing]

I really think you're confusing consensual S&M play with actual dangerous, illegal stuff. If he's into all that (which, as you tell me more about the situation, I really think he is) then that doesn't mean he's going to rape you or hurt you. If you gave off a vibe of being not into him, his sexual fantasies and possible interest in BDSM doesn't mean he's a rapist or an abuser, or some other kind of criminal. If you acted like you weren't interested in him, then of course he's going to back off and find someone who is.

Being into all that stuff doesn't make someone a "creeper" or a "weirdo" or "rape-y," and if you ever read for other people, I would really be careful about judging things and lifestyles you don't understand, and using those sorts of words. Even messages here... You never know what the lifestyle choices are of other people, and you obviously don't know a whole lot about this particular thing, so I really suggest finding a more diplomatic way to describe your uneasiness with the types of fantasies and sexual desires you're talking about. A lot of people would be deeply offended by that sort of thing.

But regardless, you've made it clear that you're not interested in any of that, so while the rest of the relationship may seem promising, the sexual aspect could become quite the obstacle, something you can't get past. Whether it has to do with S&M or whether it's something completely different, it's going to get in the way of your happiness with him. I definitely think you're better off finding someone who's a little closer to your own wavelength. I think the word you used was "normal."

I understand the lifestyle very well. I am not a sexual prude, nor ignorant about sex. However, I am not going to negate the creeper vibe of people, especially when it comes to sexuality. Yes, I do judge people, and I won't apologize for it, because I've lived long enough that if you instinctually feel a creeper vibe that you can't explain logically, then further down the road you will discover that that person is EXTREMELY problematic, and even dangerous. So I can't allow myself to care about other people's "offense", since there are 3.5 billion people in the world, and I am not trying to please them all on what they like or dislike on my opinions on the S&M subject.

And I also, know that appearances do lie. A person can have the most upright, proper image, but could be totally opposite behind closed doors. That is what bothers me as well, because I almost got caught up with a sociopath narcissist while dating one time, because he came across as a "great catch", but he was an emotional/psycological nutcase. And I dumped him way before we had the opportunity to have sex, because I knew when he kissed me, it was like a domination thing all up my mouth, like he was trying to rape me with his tongue, and when he touched me, he was always tightly grabbing me. This bullsh*t was far from being fun consensual sex. It felt like the beginning of an physically abusive relationship. Especially, when I tried to get affectionate with him, he would always push me off, but when when he wants physical contact (I wouldn't dare call it affection), he grabbed on me as if I was property and he was making sure that I knew I was never going to be his equal in the relationships, and that I was a subordinate that should obey him.

That is why I am concerned with the card, because I don't want to put myself in that position again in regarding being in a relationship with a sadist narcissist who expect me to take their abusive bullsh*t.


So, yes, you could be right with 8 swords could be consensual fun sexual S&M activities vs. totally psychopathic abusive sex. Regardless, I am just terrified because I don't know which one he is into, since the 8 swords is such a controversial card when discussing sex. Is this playful sex, or is it abusive?

*sigh*

Sorry, for the long post, but I had to explain my anxiety of the card, based on past experiences. But I am trying hard to stay neutral on the card's meaning, since I lack personal interaction with this person to find out what type of person he truly is for sure.

Again, maybe you could be right. I don't know. I mean, perhaps I should worry if the 8 swords was in the romantic relationship section, instead of sexual? Because....if the romantic relationship is abusive, then the sexual would be even more so. But if the romantic shows a caring relationships, then 8 swords in regards to sex, would be fun, happy consensual S&M roleplay?

 

[ana luisa]

I just read your account on a previous encounter with the narcissistic guy and wanted to add some advice. If this other guy is also expecting an 8 of Swords from you, it is posssible than unconsciously, you may be sending an image of someone who is ready to be submissive. Which, as you said, is NOT what you are or are ready for. I say this from personal experience. What people who see me for the first time think about me is not what they get from me either...