But I keep getting hung up on the compassion thing and dedicating merit.
Crowley included the Buddhist concept of "dedicating merit" in his A.'.A.'. system. Although, like with a lot of other Eastern doctrines, he tore the useless outer flesh away and kept the valuable inner teaching.
In the essay, One Star in Sight, Crowley makes it clear that members of the A.'.A.'. were not to claim their attainments for themselves, but must dedicate them to others as an act of service.
Aleister Crowley said:
They are all, however, bound by the original and fundamental Oath of the Order, to devote their energy to assisting the Progress of their Inferiors in the Order. Those who accept the rewards of their emancipation for themselves are no longer within the Order.
Aleister Crowley said:
He is furthermore trained to the one habit essential to Membership of the A.'.A.'.; he must regard all his attainments as primarily the property of those less advanced aspirants who are confided to his charge.
In each of the outer order A.'.A.'. oaths after Probationer there is the following clause:
Further, I promise to observe zeal in service to the [grade] under me, and to deny myself utterly on their behalf.
What is the point of all this? Well if you don't dedicate your attainment elsewhere your ego will gladly step in and claim it all for itself. This is why there are so many warnings about magick and the dangers of ego inflation. At lower levels you merely run the risk of turning into a bit of an ass-hole for a while until the universe, in her infinite
Compassion, kicks you up the back side.
Further up the Tree you can turn into a really big ass-hole called a Black Brother.
Here you might see the connection between the dedication of merit and the symbolism of pouring blood into the Cup of Babalon.
Liber Cheth said:
1. This is the secret of the Holy Graal, that is the sacred vessel of our Lady the Scarlet Woman, Babalon the Mother of Abominations, the bride of Chaos, that rideth upon our Lord the Beast.
2. Thou shalt drain out thy blood that is thy life into the golden cup of her fornication.
3. Thou shalt mingle thy life with the universal life. Thou shalt keep not back one drop.
The kick....
Liber Cheth said:
11. For if thou dost not this with thy will, then shall We do this despite thy will. So that thou attain to the Sacrament of the Graal in the Chapel of Abominations.
Of course these words are primarily aimed at the Adeptus Exemptus who is about to give up everything and leap into the Abyss. But the entire process begins at the very first step and Babalon will not refuse any offering, no matter how small, that is dedicated to her.
Liber Cheth said:
19. Wherefore I charge you that ye come unto me in the Beginning; for if ye take but one step in this Path, ye must arrive inevitably at the end thereof.