The wandering mind lingering on the past

[poivre]

OliviaRose

Believe what's in your heart that you know is
true.

Sometimes we are further along with our learning than
other people in our lives that we think should know
better than us. Stay compassionate for all who do not
understand how we feel, and know that someday they
will come to understand and respect the learning process.

just 2 cents

 

[OliviaRose]

You're so right. Thanks for that, sometimes it's hard to remember to stay compassionate for people like that.

 

[psychic sue]

My advice would be to take the Bhuddist approach :

Yesterday is gone - you can't change it so don't worry about it.

Tomorrow hasn't happened - and who knows what will happen. good or bad?

Today is all that matters - live your life in the best possible way you can TODAY.

Hope this helps - it has helped me get over general anxiety.

Sue x

 

[star-lover]

thats so true sue - they say that is why its called the present - because it is the gift
hard sometimes to do it though isn't it but well worth trying as you say it gives you some peace and space and the freedom to say hey this is a new day, i'm alive, its great, celebrate your life / celebrate YOU - where youve been where you, your uniqueness, your humanity, your strength and fraility, the good times - even the bad times all part of the package
x

 

[Lula Jing]

I don't normally hop over into spirituality, but I'm gaining an interest and so I thought I'd check it out!

TheoMo, I related to your situation on so many levels. I cannot stop thinking and replaying things, usually in transit, like on buses or trains and even while washing up at the sink! My mind is a constant movie, replaying the scenes of my life.

I have heard that asking Archangel Michael to cut negative cords and attachments helps with this process, however, do you know what? Part of me doesn't really want him to. I like my attachments to the past and even though they hurt me, I still don't want to let them go. Sound wierd? I bet I'm not alone.

Perhaps one day I will feel ready to "Call Michael".

For now, I think I will take the other wonderful advice in this thread and will try and see each day as a new present.

Best wishes,

Shy x

 

[Glass Owl]

TheoMo, I related to your situation on so many levels. I cannot stop thinking and replaying things, usually in transit, like on buses or trains and even while washing up at the sink! My mind is a constant movie, replaying the scenes of my life.

I have heard that asking Archangel Michael to cut negative cords and attachments helps with this process, however, do you know what? Part of me doesn't really want him to. I like my attachments to the past and even though they hurt me, I still don't want to let them go. Sound wierd?

I can totally relate to the memory re-plays, especially about things I regret or things I wish would have happened differently. Often these things turn up in dreams. It seems that it happens more frequently when I am stressed, tired, etc.

Perhaps doing some meditation would help me detach.

 

[CelestialHorse]

I have noticed that my mind tends to wander a lot, and that it likes to stray into thinking about my past. I will be sitting on the subway or not paying attention and suddenly I will be thinking about some random memory over my life. Sometimes they will be happy memories of people I once knew or of certain experiences, but the vast majority of the time I find myself thinking about experiences where I was embarressed or ashamed for some reason, not pleasant things!

Even after I've noticed this, it still happens quite a lot. I catch myself and try to stop it, but later on in the day it will inevitably happen again.

I find it strange that I do not daydream or fantasize about the future or imagine other things. My mind appears to be fixated on the past for some reason.

Does this happen to other people? Is there a way I can quiet my mind? Why is that I am so obessesed with instances in which I felt an embaressing emotion?

TheoMo

Me too! Yeah I try to focus on the good times and what not which helps or certain songs or shows or whatever triggers a memory. I love how my therapist I used to have (She was an intern and graduating in May), it's like a muscle when you go to that memory more and more, it gets stronger and stronger. I wish I can quiet my mind too :/ I heard meditation helps too lol. As for embarrassing things, I wish I knew the answers. I always wonder, what if other people remember it? I guess it's easy for the embarassed person to remember because it happened to them, other people may (hopefully) not rememmber because it didn't affect them in any way.

 

[CelestialHorse]

This reminds me of a time in my twenties where for about 8 years I kept having thoughts regarding a time when I was a teenager and I lost a friends riding crop. The situation somehow kept replaying in my mind coupled with the emotional impressions that I felt at the time of the incident. It made me squirm every time I had flashbacks of the whole thing.

In my 30's I went to a weekend healing retreat and the girl was there. I felt dreadful and thought, the only thing she will remember about me is loosing her riding crop years ago. The thought was starting to overtake my weekend and I was feeling really down - hoping I could throw it off somehow.

Then, she walked over to me

I had no need to fear a thing - she was the nicest person one could hope to meet - we spent alot of time talking together over that weekend and when I finally mentioned my fears to her - she didnt remember the incident at all, and then said "Ah hell I had so many of then (riding crops) I wouldnt have missed it anyway - I was a spoilt brat!"

I then realized how much of my time I had given to this incident in my life - and how I had been percieving it all this time. I was way off the mark. I hadnt considered alot of other circumstances and information around the ordeal - it really made me think about guilt and forgiveness, my perception, grace, love, healing, time - all sorts of things.

After that time when these thoughts came up again, I forgave myself for whatever happened. Meditation helped lots. Small acts of kindness, even feeding the birds and watering the garden made me feel better.

Guilt can be very debilitating to any thoughts of healing - sometimes because we have the idea that some form of punishment is necessary or deserved.
Maybe if you can come to some restful conclusion regarding the incidents of your thoughts - without bashing yourself up over it - you may find that you can move past these things and heal them the best way you know how. Theres a lesson in them all - and sometimes thats all we need to realise at the time.

I never borrowed anyones riding crop after that time - I bought one, and I lent it out too - and no... - no one lost it on me

Be kind to yourself - maybe your mind is asking you to sort through these things so that you can move on - it may be bored with these unresolved issues itself - maybe you could give yourself permission to finally find peace, make way for some new and exciting thoughts!!

Take care
Blessings
Elven x

Wow sounds like you definitely are relaxing more and stuff It does suck and it is so hardening when trying to heal but embarassing moments just keep coming at you. I think if I met my younger self I'd scold the crap out of her lol.

Glad that you were able to make peace with your friend

I getting in touch with elementary friends but I always hide away and not talk much...because I am worried that I was an annoying ugly twit back then so I worry what they think of me, what if they only remember old me and don't think oh she changed?

Healing retreats sounds so nice

 

[CelestialHorse]

Quite truthfully, every time you find yourself thinking one of these unhappy occurrances - you should force up a happy one to counteract it.

The mind is a strange thing - look at the stuff you dream at night! I daresay we all have moments where out-of-the-blue something surfaces for no reason and we haven't thought about it for 20 years and now you can't get it out of your mind. Such things must have a reason - somewhere.

My important question to you - are you merely remembering the past - or are you reliving it?

LOL my dreams are really weird I used to dream about tornadoes a lot! Hard to say if I find them interesting or it's just anger I have in me that was only hurting me, but I have lot of water in dreams, I do get chase dreams sometimes. I end up flying lol.

The mind is complicated indeed :/ I wish I can control it more lol.

 

[Cocobird55]

When I look back, I tend to focus on the good, fun things that happened to me. Also on the people who used to be part of my life that I've lost touch with.