Can you find happyness without medications?

[CelestialHorse]

Oh yes - my psychiatrist was delighted when I started swimming every day, because exercise stimulates the production of all those feel-good hormones !

But in the end - unless it is something like bi-polar and you will need permanent meds - the key is to feel OK enough ON them to sort out what made you need them so you won't need them again. Mine isn't exactly situational; they labelled it endogenous it is a chemical imbalance in me which is triggered to dump me in the dumps by certain things, and now that I can see it coming before it kicks in, I know how to stamp on the triggers ! But no-one can really advise on that stuff from a distance - it is totally individual. The time I ended up in hospital and was almost sectioned, it was caused by - both my daughters graduating, and one daughter getting engaged - and I was delighted, so it wasn't an OH GOD THE WRONG MAN thing ! Go figure...

I have been on a new med since Jan(or Feb I think). It's helping but I still have some days of depression but of course it could be the weather or I am not trying as hard to be happy XD I am reading a self esteem book and I want to get depression and anxiety for dummies, well as cognitive behavioral therapy for dummies

 

[CelestialHorse]

You can definitely be happy without medication. I have never had medication for that purpose.

The way I learnt it, ALL feelings that we have are the direct result of the thoughts we had right before them. We can learn more and more to choose and embrace the kinds of thoughts that make us happy and to choose to not have or turn off the ones that don't.

Part of it for me is my belief in the Divine. I do believe we are part of something much greater, and that there are no coincidences and that we are being guided at all times towards the best outcome. Sometimes we try to fight that, but it he don't and go with the flow we get there and have faith in life, we get there much faster.

Also a gratitude log helps, writing down 10 of so things you are grateful for in your life, either before bed or first thing in the morning. That helps to keep your focus on that, on the warn happy things. It really is just a matter of the thoughts you choose to have.And you can get better and better at choosing the ones that make you happy, And challenging the ones that don't. You get to see over time that the ones that make you happy are much closer to the truth of the matter than the ones that don't, if you really look openly and honestlyi at it. And just knowing that changes a lot.

Everything will always ultimately be ok. No uncomfortable thing in life can last forever. Life is movement and change. And what we can't change we can change how we look at it and see the good side. Since nothing is all bad, there is a good side to anything. And your lives are guided to work out in the best ways for us, in my belief system. Nothing can happen to us that is ultimately not in our best interest. This is not always easy to see at the time, but years later we can look back and see why it was for the best.

Yes you are right, Medication cannot bring you a boyfriend, and it cannot bring you money. But the point of happiness is not to acquire things that you think you want. The point of it, imo, is to learn that you don't need these things to be happy, To accept that you don;t have then or need them to be happy and that you love your life just as it is.

Money does NOT bring happiness, which is why you see so many depressed movie stars, They could likely have any bf they chose and still they are not happy. Happiness comes from the inside of you, It is not the result of what you have or what you don't. Happiness is a state of mind, not a reaction to what you have. No one can create yoru state of mind but you. You HAVE that power to make your state of mind into whatever you want. You just have put in a bit of work.

Sorry but that almost made me laugh how you tell your Dad that you are not happy with something and he tells you to get over it or to let it go. Of course that is not helpful. If you knew how to do that you would have already. The reason it made me laugh is that it reminds me of my mother. In all the years I was growing up living with her, and after, I never saw her have a common cold. Never a cold of a flu ever. I had never seen anyone else not have one. I kept asking her HOW she was able todo that. And she would say that "I don't get colds because I don't go for that! I never knew what to make of that, but it was so completley not useful it made me laugh. As if all you have to is "not go for" being ill and you never will be again.

This is not medical advice of course. And I have never had pills to make me happier, but I have been on tranquillzers at a number of different times in my life. And that also is medication to change your moods. And I found they did not help me as much as learning to change my thoughts.

It was my thoughts that were making me stressed, the thoughts that I alone was choosing. And no matter how much medication I had, it did not change my thoughts adn if I chose scary thoughts I was going to get nervous. All the medication did was make me a bit into a zombie, My thoughts came slower, but when they can they came in the same form and I stressed myeslf with them.

I am much better with that now. And yes, I truly believe you can learn to change the way you are thinking, and that changes all the rest,. When you choose better more accurate thoughts, you become calmer and calmer and happier and happier. And yes, the thoughts that we think that make us unhappy are next to never true. I have it on very good authority, that those kinds of thoughts are always untrue, distorted in some way. When we are thinking that way, we are not seeing clearly or seeing things as they actually are. That and that the worst thing we can imagine almost NEVER happens.

For what its worth, what has worked best for me with the stress (Ive had some hard experiences in my life too and 2 nervous breakdowns) is cogitive therapy. That was the one thing that is curing me. I tried a number of things first that did not make a dent in it really. It does work well for depression too.

Babs

Thanks for replying! Yeah, I am hoping that self esteem work book and my other self help books I have yet to get can help me a bit It's definitely hard work but I do and want to push myself harder. It's interesting how the "Critic" or "ego" is part of ourselves but it likes to put us down with thoughts :/

Yeah interesting how life is and I surely hope CBT can help me which is a book I want to get off amazon to put on my kindle

 

[CelestialHorse]

That is SO wrong. Not every method is right for eveyone. And medical people treating this kind of thing should think only of what is right for the patient and helpful to them. And to keep their egos out of it. I guess as you can say a good Tarot reader would also do.

For them to make you feel guilty, they are reacting to their own egos. They don't want to feel like a failure so it can't be their fault so it must be yours. That is so inappropriate.

I once had someone treating me get furious at me because he told me all patients fell in love with their therapists and then he asked me didn't I love him. I was a bit shocked by the question as it sounded so egotistical. But I honestly said no and he got really furious. Also inappropriate.

I've had a lot of differnt types of treatment before I found the one who truly is helping me now. Now things are so much better, and he really is amazing in his field. I told him when I frist came that no one had been able to help me before. And he said that there are all different kinds of treatments and not all work for everyone. I just hadn't found teh right one yet. It was like I had a headache and I came to the doctor and he gave me cough syrup. It was a well known medication, but not the right one for me or for what I had.

When you find the right one for you, then it works. And hey he was right. he was a little miracle worker. But the fault is not in you, it's that the treatment they were giving you was not the right one for you, And making you feel guilty was not needed, helpful or even ethical really.

Babs

I used to have a great therapist, one of the reasons why I wish to move back to the town where I used to know her She's great and I dunno I just love her energy, I feel safe and I feel I can trust her

Other therapists I had? They didn't help. I then used to think psychics could help but most of the ones I went to weren't accurate. That's why I use cards a bit more than psychics, I feel I trust my cards a bit more .

The medications I had backfired on me eventually.

I do hope to find something that will help me. I do sometimes think my depression is situational.

 

[Zephyros]

I don't think the point, or goal, is being happy in quite the way you're describing it. Neither spiritual nor mundane happiness is going around with a big smile on your face all the time, and that's exactly where all those New Age happiness gurus get it wrong. Trying not to have negative thoughts all the time can be tiring and is ultimately self-defeating.

If medication helps, then it does, and the result is the you that should have been without the depression. Even if you want to do anything spiritual, it should be done out of strength, not blind despair or neediness. In addition, you have to be able to have a normal, constructive life for spirituality, or else it's both barren and doomed to fail.

I was on medication for a few years, about five years ago and I remembered feeling "guilty" that I was using a crutch, but in time I got over it. People with asthma use their medication, people with broken legs use crutches, and I had my own problems. Sometimes chronic conditions pass, sometimes you're chemically imbalanced for life, and have to try to make the most of it. I'm not on medication any more, because of several reasons, but I'm a depressive, negative person, and that's a part of me as much as my nose is. While I can handle myself and I have a job and a life, I have accepted I will never be "perky," and I don't want to be. Accept yourself and your medication.

 

[CelestialHorse]

I wonder if the odd weather of late is also in need of examination on the couch. Perhaps it's a reflection of the unsettled times and your really in tune better than you think..


Letting Go as advised by your pop isn't that easy to do and I can understand your confusions related to it.

To let something go, requires that you let it be exactly what it is, without preferences .



A problem is simply that ...A problem... Now throw in your opinions , your preferences, your should be's, etc and it's now grown to be something that it 's not.

LET IT GO( without input) and one can become untangled again.

Your Pop is just your Pop...until,,, it becomes complicated by other input.

Thanks for explaining Heh yeah I think the weather is affecting us probably with the cold. I wouldn't be shocked if I have S.A.D (Seasonal affective disorder). Heh I DO have a light that helps with it right next to my computer, I should use it more or should have XD

 

[CelestialHorse]

I've just learnt that the magnetic flux of the earth is moving...scientifically accepted. I think they said somewhere near Brazil...It's apparently upsetting planes and navagational equiptment.

If that be so,,, then it's not a great leap in logic to assume that the magnetic flux is affecting the minds of some. Especially those that are sensitive in the first place.

Interesting huh.

Hm that's a very interesting thought! I do want to learn more about that now

I mean I have days where I am just feeling like a zombie, don't know what to feel. Like few days ago I felt "off" for no reason.

 

[CelestialHorse]

I don't think the point, or goal, is being happy in quite the way you're describing it. Neither spiritual nor mundane happiness is going around with a big smile on your face all the time, and that's exactly where all those New Age happiness gurus get it wrong. Trying not to have negative thoughts all the time can be tiring and is ultimately self-defeating.

If medication helps, then it does, and the result is the you that should have been without the depression. Even if you want to do anything spiritual, it should be done out of strength, not blind despair or neediness. In addition, you have to be able to have a normal, constructive life for spirituality, or else it's both barren and doomed to fail.

I was on medication for a few years, about five years ago and I remembered feeling "guilty" that I was using a crutch, but in time I got over it. People with asthma use their medication, people with broken legs use crutches, and I had my own problems. Sometimes chronic conditions pass, sometimes you're chemically imbalanced for life, and have to try to make the most of it. I'm not on medication any more, because of several reasons, but I'm a depressive, negative person, and that's a part of me as much as my nose is. While I can handle myself and I have a job and a life, I have accepted I will never be "perky," and I don't want to be. Accept yourself and your medication.

I understand what you're saying It is hard to be happy everyday yeah. Even with my medication sometimes it helps me but I like to hope maybe it takes the edge off a little bit.

I don't get how some people out there act sooo happy like life is perfect. Do they REALLY feel that way or is it a mask? :/

 

[Eco74]

I don't think the point, or goal, is being happy in quite the way you're describing it. Neither spiritual nor mundane happiness is going around with a big smile on your face all the time, and that's exactly where all those New Age happiness gurus get it wrong. Trying not to have negative thoughts all the time can be tiring and is ultimately self-defeating.

If medication helps, then it does, and the result is the you that should have been without the depression. Even if you want to do anything spiritual, it should be done out of strength, not blind despair or neediness. In addition, you have to be able to have a normal, constructive life for spirituality, or else it's both barren and doomed to fail.

I was on medication for a few years, about five years ago and I remembered feeling "guilty" that I was using a crutch, but in time I got over it. People with asthma use their medication, people with broken legs use crutches, and I had my own problems. Sometimes chronic conditions pass, sometimes you're chemically imbalanced for life, and have to try to make the most of it. I'm not on medication any more, because of several reasons, but I'm a depressive, negative person, and that's a part of me as much as my nose is. While I can handle myself and I have a job and a life, I have accepted I will never be "perky," and I don't want to be. Accept yourself and your medication.

Thankyou Closrapexa! This is such a brilliant way of explaining it.

Often, we forget that the smiling faces and perky looks and seemingly perfect surfaces we see are only temporary glances. We can't possibly assume that just because someone looks happy walking along at the supermarket they're just as happy all the time. Or that the person walking along with a smile on their face wears it 24 hours a day.
They could just be having a little time to themselves after having been stressing out all week, finally got a babysitter so they can do something for themselves for an hour or gotten better from an illness so they can finally go outdoors etc.

I admit to being a mostly happy person, but I've had my bouts with depression.
I managed to get through it and still have what I call 'low tides', but they don't go beyond the low tides into that old abyss.
Or another way of putting it: The girl formerly in the dark cave is now walking around in a garden. Sometimes the roses are not in full bloom, but that's normal. There are seasons to everything and a time to rest and gather energy for the next burst of growth is just as important as the actual growth.

 

[re-pete-a]

It's good that you mentioned the seasons of changes..The weather is a great indicator of the ebb and flow of life.
Sometimes wild ,sometimes mild. Always changing eventually. Without those changes not very much would be as we know it today.
To want a flat line existance is not a good thing, nor a continious hi.

Was it Shakespeare that said something about "The winters of our discontents."

 

[CelestialHorse]

I'd be happier probably(a bit) if it was always warm The cold weather I just hate and it makes me moody.