Ever think it's just time to hang it up?

[Amanda]

Wow, those are some stories. I'm sure I have none that even come close to anything like that.

That's the thing. I had moved on from the first tragedy. I was shaken, I questioned myself, I questioned everything -- pulled all the cards out I could remember were in that kid's reading and went over them and over them... after this incident a psychic told me (because I asked) that I was put in his path as a last-ditched effort to get him to see something, but ultimately he was meant to die.

I had mostly gotten over it or moved past it at least, until today. What are the chances that I would be connected to two tragic occurrences by way of tarot card reading in such a short amount of time?

I mean... it's not like in 2010 when I was pulling cards to see when I could expect my 83 year-old grandmother to pass who was certainly on her way out from old age and cancer (I pulled the 3 of Swords for about a week later and she died that day). Was it okay for me to know then because I already kind of knew it was coming?

However, as to quitting... well, first of all, I can't. It's been practically a part of me since I was 13. Although there are times I don't read for months (maybe even years, it's been a long time, after all) I would be hard put not to know that even if I wasn't reading, I was still a reader, if that makes sense.

Yeah, it does make sense. Maybe I'm confusing myself as a reader with the readings.

As to accuracy and the things you've gone through... well, think of all the good you've done over time. You may not have foreseen those incidents, and you may not foresee many others, but we can't. No one can. As I see it, whether or not I predict the future, if I have given even a single person in all my years hope that this world can be even a little bit better, then it was all worth it. After all, if you hadn't been a reader, think of all those people who would have missed your insights, enjoyment out your readings, expanding their minds... I don't have to tell you Tarot's benefits.

I suppose it's easier to see these very large negative events standing out from all the rest. I do feel like I'm trying not to let these events overshadow the good ones, but it's still striking me as... odd.

What I tell people who sit for me is that they may or may not get anything out of my reading; I may be right or wrong, but at least they are sitting down for a few minutes talking to a nice person (me) about their lives, and that in itself is immensely beneficial.

This world is a vale of tears, we do what we can in our own very small ways to make it better. Even if we don't succeed, I truly think merely trying is already making it better.

The guy who died in the fire... he was great. He seemed like a well-liked individual, had a winning personality, he seemed like the type who could be friends with anyone. Reading for him was a pleasure... he and some others stayed that night, and I gave him a blanket and pillow of mine to use because no one else had anymore... maybe I'm just too sensitive.

 

[Eeviee]

These people are responsible for their own actions. Anything you could have seen or said to them would probably not have made a huge difference.

RE, your readings:
- Perhaps at the time of these readings everything was going fine/looking fine for them. Things change, shit happens.

- Perhaps the Universe was trying to send them positive/encouraging readings to coax them into a better state of mind/being. Any bad news or warnings might have only emphasized or sped up their actions.

- Perhaps you only channel the more positive aspects of the "future".

- Perhaps the Universe did not see fit to torment you with the foreboding of these terrible incidents. -If you had seen bad things, how much more would it bother you having an idea that something terrible was about to happen that you had no control over?

You are who you are, and they are who they are. The cards just serve as a medium, bridging the gaps of the unknown/subconscious...

Do not let these terrible things stop you unless you are looking for an excuse to stop. Just because something bad happened to a few people, does not make you a bad/poor reader. -Think of all the other people you may have helped; you, yourself, stated that a rather large number of people came in and out of that house that you read for. It sounds to me like a lot of these people were lost/wandering/floundering/searching... The odds are half might have succumbed to tragedy. Two out of a larger number is not all that bad. ;]

 

[Amanda]

We also can't control what happens. Millions of people die every day, and I wish we could save them all, but we can't.

You know, rationally speaking, I think I know this. I might be at odds with myself because of this, because I do know that I should know better. It's talked about all the time here.. but just being so close to it freaks me out just a little bit. A tarot reading opens you up to someone else... maybe I've been too open.

Let me tell you a story. I once knew someone who was diagnosed with schizophrenia. He was in and out of hospitals, treated by a veritable army of therapists, social workers, hospitals and sacks of medication. However, one time, shortly after leaving the hospital because he was told he could provided he was under supervision, he jumped off a building and killed himself. To tell you the truth, I had a dire crisis because of this. I just couldn't accept or understand how a person that had the best medical treatment available could do that. How could all those psychiatrists not foresee what would happen?

To this day, I haven't found the answers to those questions. I'll probably never find the answers, probably because there aren't any. Some people go and do stupid things, and nothing, not therapists or Tarot readers, can stop them.

Do I think the entire psychological profession is a lie? No, I'm sure it does millions of people good. And yet he killed himself. Again, there simply are no answers, and you shouldn't take responsibility for something that was completely out of your control.

Makes perfect sense...

 

[Amanda]

Amanda, you cannot hold yourself accountable for the actions of others when you have zero control over them. You did the readings to the best of your ability, neither more nor less. The rest is out of your hands.

I guess I'm just wondering why... why was I so close to not just one tragedy, but two? Is someone "up there" trying to tell me something? And if so, what? Is it really that I just can't hold myself accountable and I have no control?

You're a fantastic reader. Ask anyone here who's been around the forum for a while - and I know, I've read a lot of your interpretations. So please, try not to be so hard on yourself or doubt your skills because of these two tragedies. There is nothing you could have done to prevent them.

Ultimately, people can only be helped if they want to be helped.

I hope you'll keep on journeying with the Tarot.

Thank you.
I'm going to think about it for a while.

 

[Sword King]

Hey Amanda,

I get it. Lightning struck right beside you - twice! But if you're going to dwell on that, you should also pause to consider all of the people you have helped along the way - myself included - with your gift. Perhaps the message is just that: that there are painful limits to even the most gifted readers. If we could predict the Dow's shifts or forex rates accurately, we'd all be rich, right? But tarot isn't about that; I think it's about the greater good. If you pause to count it all up, I bet you'll find you've done a lot of good on the balance.

Stay with it, even when the universe challenges you not to.

 

[Amanda]

I guess this has been a lesson in that all we can really do is read into a person's potential. We can only get glimpses of what's really out there and only God knows what's truly in store for us. After saying this and while doing a reading, I feel that our Superior is looking down on us with a smile and saying.....If you only knew.

Humbled again.

I don't know if I feel humbled as a result. I feel like this new occurrence dug up the old occurrence, and that old occurrence was a little too close for comfort for me.

The guy that killed the baby- I spoke with him for a while too, but the only thing I can seem to remember now is that he asked me when he would die- I pulled the Doreen Virtue angel card that said "Ask". I think I discussed his relationship (which would be the mother of the baby now) but I don't remember a thing about it.

I'm sorry Amanda ((amanda))
you're not responsible for what happened to them. It's just unfortunate events!
I would be so sad if you hang up your tarot cards! (I am not sure if that is the correct term, box them away? ) but anyway I would miss your posts on here if you did decide to that!

Thank you for saying so, I wasn't aware that you (or anyone else who has said so in this thread) paid much attention... I guess it's easier to feel hidden and unnoticed behind a computer screen.

If you are feeling upset about this, why not think of a disclaimer to read or say before a reading? like people with websites have? for example:- I am not a professional, lawyer or doctor, I cannot guarantee the outcome and it does not replace your own free will and decision making. In the UK you legally have to say that a reading is for 'entertainment purposes only' before any professional reading. they class it as fun entertainment rather than getting advice.

I probably did say something to that effect at the time... and I didn't charge them anything; it was for me too... I seemed to suddenly have a lot of interest at the time from multiple people I didn't know who were just curious, so I freely shared what I knew with them and it was all done under very casual circumstances.

Anyway I think you have just been unlucky and thinking about 2 horrible situations. I bet there is people you have really helped with their lives too x

I hope so, thank you.

 

[Amanda]

Hey Amanda,

I get it. Lightning struck right beside you - twice! But if you're going to dwell on that, you should also pause to consider all of the people you have helped along the way - myself included - with your gift. Perhaps the message is just that: that there are painful limits to even the most gifted readers. If we could predict the Dow's shifts or forex rates accurately, we'd all be rich, right? But tarot isn't about that; I think it's about the greater good. If you pause to count it all up, I bet you'll find you've done a lot of good on the balance.

Stay with it, even when the universe challenges you not to.

Yes, that's exactly it! Like lightning striking right beside me twice!! And I wasn't even holding a lightning rod or doing anything "dangerous" to begin with. So I have to wonder, what is the limit since I wasn't (I don't think) doing anything wrong? You'd think a lightning strike is a warning, right?

 

[Amanda]

I agree with the others... I too have questioned this, but Amanda, I think your readings are amazing, and you would be depriving so many people of enjoyment if you were to stop.

I think you have to look at the bigger picture... they are only a small part of the whole, and you are not in any way responsible for those incidents, nor should you castigate yourself for being unable to forsee them.

Thank you!
It's just hard to believe... I would much prefer to find out someone got a reading from me and found the love of their life and moved to Brazil and had a ton of babies or something, you know?

The cards really aren't meant to show everything. For the guy who died in a fire, that is horrible, BUT sometimes accidents or other awful things happen. Sometimes the cards don't show stuff like that, and sometimes they do.

His reading was great -- I remember laughing with him a lot, and he smiled and nodded a lot, and I remember touching on specific things that made his eyes get real big in awe... it was truly a great reading I think -- and then next thing I know people are coming and going from the house in tears.

As for the other guy - who knows what happened between the time you read for him then, and where his life ended up. And even if the cards had given him advice about the situation he found himself in with the baby, three years later he probably wouldn't have remembered it anyway.

That's a good point. I've done readings for myself where I saw something happening and didn't remember reading on it until it happened - and it didn't take 3 years either.

So, don't give up. the cards can be very helpful, but they are not everything - it also depends on the choices the people you read for make.

(((Amanda_04))).

Thank you.

 

[willowfox]

I believe that "we" are meant to know, I believe that the cards, stars, coins do warn us but "we" are blind to the message because it doesn't "fit" or "we" are afraid to say what we see in case it's just plain wrong, or we are just not looking for such strange, "twilight realm", occurrences.


How can we "see" or even imagine that next week a plane will crash into the querent's house killing them but the cards with hindsight said it was a possibility.


Final Destination was a fun series of movies but it's not reality, death can be avoided with fore-warnings, how many people are alive because of a premonition or some "soothsayer" saying that "your stars" are really bad next week, man, don't fly.

If "we" look for everything then we will find something.

 

[ThunderWolf]

I guess I'm just wondering why... why was I so close to not just one tragedy, but two?

I admit that I haven't read all the replies and only skimmed the ones I have. I do think it's worth mentioning that when you read the guy who killed his kid he was still a kid with a lot of development to take place before he would kill his kid at age 23. That's like 9 years later! I don't see how that equates with being close to that tragedy to be quite honest.

I do understand that you shared a lunch table with a kid who ended up becoming the adult who committed this atrocity, but you sat down to lunch with a kid who had not yet had the chance to develop into someone who would do such a thing. I suspect that having had a brief acquaintance with him 9 years prior to this has no connection between you and what he recently did.

As for the 19 year old, I personally believe that most times the cards show us things that we can change if we do something differently. But I also believe that we make "contracts" prior to incarnating that certain events will take place during our lifetime and that these contracts are set in stone. I'm a firm and unwavering believer that this is the case with the time of a person's death. I truly believe that nobody is taken before their time or manages to stay (even with the aid of modern medicine) beyond their appointed time. If that's the case there was no reason for the cards to show you what was to come as it was meant to be. As for the signifigance to you/your life being impacted by that event, it might serve you better to quit asking why "lightening struck" and search within yourself to see what kind of lesson that might have taught you. It obviously had an impact upon you, so what did you learn as a result of that event?

My personal thoughts are that his death happened as it was meant to. The fact that you interacted with him so close to that happening was certainly relevant to your own life and probably happened so you could learn some sort of lesson through that experience. The fact that he died didn't directly have anything to do with you in the sense that it would have happened whether you were around or not.

I hope all my ramblings have made sense and are somehow helpful to you.