Originally posted by Lady Mary So why shouldn?t he be able to turn them into reality. And why should the Queen of Swords always find a hair in the soup and criticize him? And why should he always spoil her dinner parties? I picture both of them way too smart to do such things (in a fate-like manner). They know what they have of each other.
You're certainly free to disagree and feel otherwise--but please don't misunderstand. Smarts has nothing to do with it. The smartest people in the world can ruin a marriage. We're talking personality. We're also talking about a good marriage. The Q/S is, by nature, fairly cool in personality. If she wasn't, she wouldn't be the Queen of Swords. That's what these cards are all about. Not sterotypes but Archtypes. And the Q/S archtype is that of the cool, focused, dignified, super intelligent, very adult and very in control woman. Can she love? Certainly. But she's going to show it in HER own way--if you could "melt" her, or make her show her love demonstratively she would not be who she is. Just as the Magician is who he is--playful and wild, brilliant, charming.
Speaking of which, you say the Magician "doesn?t necessarily have to be someone who is always wasting his talents." I'm sorry, did I say that? You will remember, I'm
married to a Magician. And that is the LAST thing I would ever say. My husband is one of the smartest, most creative men I know, and I'd never, for an instant, say he was wasting his talents.
But I know women who would and have said it. Women who don't understand why he isn't using his intelligence in a more focused and reliable manner--like working in a lab, or at a 9-to-5 business, etc. A lot of these women are Queen of Sword types. They enjoy my husband's company just fine, have great discussions with him, match wits with him. But he's NOT WHAT THEY WANT IN A HUSBAND. The one question I always get asked by these women--"Is he like that all the time?" And they shake their heads. "That would drive me crazy."
Because he's never quiet or still--and I don't mean talking, I mean personality. He's a LOUD personality. He's out and about, he's surrounded by others, he's coming up with a million ideas--and he doesn't always follow through with one idea before he's onto a new one. The Queen of Swords wants and needs a man of focus. He can do his own thing, certainly. But she wants that "point" at the end. Don't get me wrong, the Magician DOES have a point, always. But it's not always evident, nor will it remain the same as he develops it--and that could drive the Queen of Swords crazy.
Also, the Queen of Swords isn't one who likes to play. That's just not her. Nothing wrong with it. She's dignified. She's adult--and she wants her mate to be the same. The Magician is playful, and he's going to be hurt if his wife won't play with him--not all the time, but a LOT.
If the Queen of Swords can't give him that, can't give him a LOT of attention, a LOT of her time, a LOT of play, then she's not a good wife for him. And if he creates a lot of chaos in her life, keeping her from her focus and dignity, then he's not a good husband for her. Simple as that. Doesn't mean they can't be friends, can't like or even love each other. But as so many divorced couples will tell you, love, however intense, isn't always enough. You have to be able to give the other person what they need. If they feel they can only get things done, are only
themselves, their REAL selves when they're not with you...then you don't really have a very good relationship, do you?
But you seem to really identify with the Queen of Swords--do you really feel that she's you're alter ego? And are you happily married to a Magician?
hhehehee
